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All Ears English, 13- How to Date in America

13- How to Date in America

Lindsay: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 13: Meeting Monday. And today our topic is “Dating in American Culture.” Gabby: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, where you'll finally get real, native English conversation. Now here are your hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer' and Gabby Wallace, the ‘Language Angel', coming to you from Boston, Massachusetts, USA.

Lindsay: In today's episode, you'll learn how to date Americans or how to date American style with confidence.

Gabby: All right in today's episode, we're talking about dating in American culture. And we've gotten some great questions about “Why do Americans do so and so?” So in this episode we want to address some of those questions and just talk about how dating in English and in American culture might be different from your home culture. So hopefully, you'll, um, learn some new facts. Maybe some of the questions you're afraid to ask, we will talk about today. And uh, hope it'll be exciting and informative.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: So, what's one thing you think is different about dating in the US?

Lindsay: Yeah.

So, I think one thing that's probably most definitely different is online dating. The emergence of online dating. Right? So… Gabby: It's huge.

Lindsay: Yeah.

It's huge.

It seems like it's a – for me it seems like more of an urban thing. Um, what do you think about that?

Gabby: I think it's more accepted in, in big cities, because, you know, there's (there are) more people doing it, maybe big cities tend to be more progressive.

Lindsay: People are busier.

Gabby: Yeah.

Absolutely. I think when you work long hours, um, it's, it's more difficult to meet someone in person.

Lindsay: For sure.

Gabby: And also in the city, people are just kind of less open; they're more closed. Like if you're walking…

Lindsay: More guarded.

Gabby: More guarded. You're walking down the street, people don't say “Good morning. How are you?” like they do in a small town and it's actually kind of frowned upon sometimes to just be like really open because you don't know. I mean, cities are more dangerous.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: Anyway, I think that's why people look to online dating because of time… Lindsay: Yeah. Gabby: …and just the culture of the city.

Lindsay: And also, I would also say to add to that the fact that there are so many people, right – so in New York City, there are 8 million people so you need to actually – it sounds horrible – you need to start to filter out… Gabby: Yeah. Lindsay: …certain people. So with online dating you're able to specify what you're looking for.

Gabby: And target what you're looking for.

Lindsay: Filter out and target.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: So it kind of works and so the view of online dating from an urban perspective is, in my opinion, totally accepted.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: But if I were to talk to my friends, who maybe got married earlier or live outside of the city, I think it's a little bit different.

Gabby: Right.

And I think several years ago, people didn't wanna (want to) say that they met online.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: It's kind of – it was taboo…

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: …but I think now it's not really taboo for a lot of people. That's how they meet and I, I know several people have gotten married… Lindsay: Yeah. Gabby: …and, you know, had like great relationships from meeting someone online.

Lindsay: Why not? I mean it's hard to meet the person that you're really looking for, so if you can give yourself another opportunity, why not?

Gabby: Yeah.

So and uh, making uh profile's a great way to…

Lindsay: Practice your English.

Gabby: And uh exchanging messages with people. Again, fun way to practice English. Some really popular sites right now are OkCupid. I think that one's – I mean it's popular because it's free and um, it's easy to use. There's (there are) other ones too like eHarmony, Match.com.

Lindsay: There's a site called HowAboutWe where you can actually say what you wanna (want to) do, so it's more about action, getting out and doing something with the person, rather than talking about who you are and what you like.

Gabby: Oh, very cool.

Lindsay: You invite them out. Let's go walk across a bridge.

Gabby: Hiking.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Let's go for a hike and have dinner.

Gabby: Wow!

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: That sounds like fun. I hadn't heard about that one.

Lindsay: Mm-hm.

Gabby: Um, I know, there's – I mean for every different kind of demographic, like, you know, if you are over 55, right, there is Seniors Meet, so. I mean there's (there are) different kinds of – like there's (there are) religious dating sites as well. Like if you are a Christian, Muslim, you know, whatever – if you feel strongly about a religion, you can find a site.

Lindsay: Definitely.

Gabby: I don't know specific names, but like the most popular just for the general public, I think, are like OkCupid, eHarmony, Match.com.

Lindsay: Yeah.

For sure.

Interesting. And then as far as like the way that American people date – I mean generally, what I've seen is that people tend to, um, you know, go out with a few different people three or four times, then you might need tend to, you know, make a decision as to how serious you are about one person and…

Gabby: One of the – sorry. One of the biggest differences between dating in the US and dating in other cultures is dating several people at once.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: I mean, the only limit is your time. Right? You could be dating one, two, three, four, five. I don't know. Or how much time you have, but, um, it's, it's very different whereas in other cultures, I get the impression that you date one person at a time.

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: But in the US, as you said, I mean, we go on maybe three to five dates… Lindsay: Right. Right.

Gabby: …with different people at the same time.

Lindsay: Yeah.

And it seems like the, just the culture, the action of like going on a date, seems like something that might be unique to American… Gabby: yeah. Lindsay: …but maybe not just American culture, but I think a lot of cultures, other cultures might not do it. Right.

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: Let's go to a movie and have dinner. Let's go have coffee as a first date. Right.

Gabby: Right.

Something short and like not, not a big commitment at first. Like maybe you get a drink, or, you know. Um, yeah, something short, like an hour or something.

Lindsay: Easy. Yeah.

Gabby: And then maybe your second date would be a little longer, like dinner or a movie or something like that. But generally after, what would you say like four dates, you would…

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: …you would either continue with that person or kind of nicely let them go.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Yeah.

I love the expression ‘let them go.' Gabby: Yeah. Lindsay: Just you would probably think becoming sort of exclusive with that person maybe. Um, oh our parents' generation used to call it ‘going steady,' but we don't really use that term anymore.

Gabby: Well and if you keep going out on dates with someone that you're not interested in, we call that ‘stringing along.' Lindsay: Yeah. Gabby: Or ‘leading on.'

Lindsay: ‘Leading them on.' Yeah, that's a good one.

Gabby: And, and so I think in other cultures, there's also this official moment where um, you know, maybe one person would ask, “Do you want to be my girlfriend?” or “Do you want to be my boyfriend?” Lindsay: Or perhaps, um, you know, it's like an official kind of moment, whereas in the US it's – I don't feel like that happens as often. It could, but it's sometimes um, implied, but it's a little complicated, it's a little messy. Whaddya (what do you) think about that?

Gabby: Yeah.

Maybe it's just a personal thing, like maybe you would have a talk like “Okay, what's the status of our relationship?”

Lindsay: Yeah, like “What's happening with us? Like where's the relationship going?” But you might not phrase it in that way, like “Do you wanna (want to) be my boyfriend?” Or you might not say it exactly.

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Yeah.

Gabby: But being exclusive is a popular term and that just means that you're not seeing other people and so you're basically, uh, boyfriend, girlfriend. You know, you're, you're in a relationship, um, but it's, it's not – you may not ask uh, “Do you want to be my whatever?”

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: So…

Lindsay: Yeah.

Interesting. So we have a lot of strange, um, yeah, traditions and customs in terms of the way we, the way we date.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: Um, anything else we wanted to mention to that end?

Gabby: Oh gosh! Well, one, one thing is like when you go out on a date, um, the, the idea of who is supposed to get the check or get the bill – I think that it's changed in recent years. I mean usually, you know, like, like a man and a woman going out, the man would always pick up the tab, pick up the check, or the bill.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: And I think now the idea of ‘going Dutch' is really popular.

Lindsay: Good one.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: So what does that mean?

Gabby: Each person pays for their – well half and half or you pay for what you drank or ate.

Lindsay: Right.

Yeah.

Usually I like to go half and half rather than figuring out what everyone got ‘cause (because) it feels so… I don't know…stiff. Gabby: Yeah. Lindsay: …to go through “Oh, you ordered this,” and I ordered – but yeah, ‘going Dutch' is just splitting the bill. Right. Gabby: And now, I mean there's uh – well women, obviously, are working, we're independent, we can pay for our own, uh, our parts of the dinner or whatever. So I think um – it's just kind of – that idea of being equal, um, so that's – and not having any responsibility, you know, to pay for the other person or to feel indebted or anything.

Lindsay: Which is good.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: You pay your own way. You don't feel like you necessarily have to go out on another date with the person…

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: …if you didn't like them. So.

Gabby: But it depends. I mean people do things differently, but that's just kind of a general trend, I think.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Interesting stuff. All right. Great. Thanks for having a chat.

Gabby: Yeah.

Thanks Lindsay. See ya' (you)!

Lindsay: You listeners know that we've created this awesome podcast for you. But that's not all. We've also created an e-book to help you get the most out of listening to every episode. And the best thing is it's free. It's free for you guys, our listeners. So to get the e-book for free, just come visit us at www.allearsenglish.com/free.

Gabby: Thanks for listening to the All Ears English Podcast. We're here to help you learn English and you can help us by leaving a five star review on iTunes.

See you next time.

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13- How to Date in America 如何|||| 13- Wie man sich in Amerika verabredet 13- Cómo tener citas en Estados Unidos 13- Come uscire in America 13- アメリカでのデートの仕方 13- 미국에서 데이트하는 방법 13- Jak umawiać się na randki w Ameryce 13- Como namorar na América 13- Как встречаться в Америке 13- Amerika'da Nasıl Çıkılır? 13-如何在美国约会 13-如何在美國約會

Lindsay: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 13: Meeting Monday. Lindsay podcast|This||||||||| Lindsay|||||||Podcast||| Lindsay:這是一個全耳英語播客,第 13 集:週一會議。 And today our topic is “Dating in American Culture.” Gabby: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, where you'll finally get real, native English conversation. |||||Dating|||Culture|||||||American English|Podcast|||||||| 今天我們的主題是「美國文化中的約會」。 Gabby:歡迎來到 All Ears English Podcast,在這裡您終於可以得到真正的、道地的英語對話。 Now here are your hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer' and Gabby Wallace, the ‘Language Angel', coming to you from Boston, Massachusetts, USA. |||||||||||Language Angel|Wallace||Language Angel|||||||Massachusetts| |||||リンジー|||||||||||||||||

Lindsay: In today's episode, you'll learn how to date Americans or how to date American style with confidence. ||||||||约会||||||||| Lindsay:今日のエピソードでは、アメリカ人とデートする方法や、自信を持ってアメリカンスタイルとデートする方法を学びます。 Линдси: В сегодняшнем выпуске вы узнаете, как встречаться с американцами или как встречаться в американском стиле с уверенностью. Lindsay:在今天的節目中,您將學習如何與美國人約會或如何自信地與美國風格約會。

Gabby: All right in today's episode, we're talking about dating in American culture. Gabby: Muy bien en el episodio de hoy, estamos hablando de citas en la cultura americana. 蓋比:好吧,在今天的節目中,我們談論的是美國文化中的約會。 And we've gotten some great questions about “Why do Americans do so and so?” So in this episode we want to address some of those questions and just talk about how dating in English and in American culture might be different from your home culture. Y hemos recibido grandes preguntas sobre "¿Por qué los americanos hacen tal y tal cosa?". Así que en este episodio queremos abordar algunas de esas preguntas y simplemente hablar de cómo salir en inglés y en la cultura americana puede ser diferente de tu cultura de origen. Abbiamo ricevuto molte domande: "Perché gli americani fanno così e così?" In questo episodio vogliamo rispondere ad alcune di queste domande e parlare di come gli appuntamenti in inglese e nella cultura americana possano essere diversi dalla vostra cultura di origine. 我們收到了一些關於「美國人為什麼這樣做?」的重要問題。因此,在本集中,我們想解決其中一些問題,並討論英語和美國文化中的約會可能與您的家鄉文化有何不同。 So hopefully, you'll, um, learn some new facts. |希望||||||事实 所以希望你能,嗯,學到一些新的事實。 Maybe some of the questions you're afraid to ask, we will talk about today. 也許您害怕問一些問題,我們今天將討論。 And uh, hope it'll be exciting and informative. |||||||cung cấp thông tin |||||||有益な |||||||информативным |||||||有益的 嗯,希望它會令人興奮且資訊豐富。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: So, what's one thing you think is different about dating in the US? Gabby: Entonces, ¿qué es lo que crees que es diferente acerca de las citas en los EE. UU.? 蓋比:那麼,你認為在美國約會有什麼不同呢?

Lindsay: Yeah.

So, I think one thing that's probably most definitely different is online dating. Therefore|||||||||||| 所以,我認為最明顯不同的一件事就是線上約會。 The emergence of online dating. |兴起||| |オンラインデートの出現||| |появление||| |興起||| El surgimiento de las citas en línea. オンラインデートの出現。 Появление онлайн-знакомств. 網上約會的出現。 Right? So… Gabby: It's huge. 所以… Gabby:它很大。

Lindsay: Yeah.

It's huge. |enorme

It seems like it's a – for me it seems like more of an urban thing. |||||||||||||đô thị| |||||||||||||城市的| |||||||||||||城市的| Parece que es un, para mí parece más una cosa urbana. 對我來說,這似乎更像是一種城市事物。 Um, what do you think about that? 嗯,你對此有何看法?

Gabby: I think it's more accepted in, in big cities, because, you know, there's (there are) more people doing it, maybe big cities tend to be more progressive. |||||||||||||||||||||||往往||||进步的 ||think|||||||||||||||||||||||||forward-thinking |||||||||||||||||||||||||||進歩的な |||||||||||||||||||||||||||進步 |||||||||||||||||||||||||||tiến bộ Gabby: Creo que es más aceptado en las grandes ciudades, porque, ya sabes, hay (hay) más personas que lo hacen, tal vez las grandes ciudades tienden a ser más progresistas. Gabby: 我认为在大城市更受欢迎,因为你知道,有更多人这样做,也许大城市更趋于进步。 蓋比:我認為它在大城市更容易被接受,因為,你知道,有更多的人這樣做,也許大城市往往更進步。

Lindsay: People are busier. |||更忙碌 Lindsay: La gente está más ocupada. Lindsay: 人们更忙。 Lindsay:人們更忙了。

Gabby: Yeah. Gabby: 是的。

Absolutely. I think when you work long hours, um, it's, it's more difficult to meet someone in person. ||||||||||||||||本人 我認為當你工作很長時間時,嗯,面對面見到某人會更困難。

Lindsay: For sure.

Gabby: And also in the city, people are just kind of less open; they're more closed. Gabby: Y también en la ciudad, la gente es un poco menos abierta; son más cerrados. ギャビー:そしてまた、街では、人々はちょっとオープンではありません。彼らはもっと閉鎖されています。 蓋比:而且在城市裡,人們也不太開放。他們更加封閉。 Like if you're walking… 就像如果你正在走路一樣…

Lindsay: More guarded. ||更谨慎 |more| ||cẩn trọng hơn Lindsay: Más cauteloso. 林賽:更加謹慎。

Gabby: More guarded. |更谨慎| |more| You're walking down the street, people don't say “Good morning. 你走在街上,人們不會說「早安」。 How are you?” like they do in a small town and it's actually kind of frowned upon sometimes to just be like really open because you don't know. |||||do||||||||||disapproved of|||||||||||| |||||||||||||||không được chấp|||||||||||| |||||||||||||||disapprovato|malvisto||||||||||| |||||||||||||||不赞成|被赞同||||||||因为||| |||||||||||||||ไม่ค่อยยอมรับ|||||||||||| |||||||||||||||眉をひそめる|||||||||||| Comment vas-tu?" comme ils le font dans une petite ville et c'est parfois mal vu d'être vraiment ouvert parce que vous ne savez pas. Come stai?", come si fa in una piccola città, e a volte è un po' disapprovato essere davvero aperti perché non si sa. 你好嗎?”就像他們在小鎮上所做的那樣,有時因為你不知道而真正開放,實際上有點令人不悅。 I mean, cities are more dangerous. 我的意思是,城市更危險。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: Anyway, I think that's why people look to online dating because of time… Lindsay: Yeah. ||||那是为什么||||||||||| ||||||individuals||||||||| 加比:無論如何,我認為這就是人們因為時間原因而尋求線上約會的原因…… Lindsay:是的。 Gabby: …and just the culture of the city. Gabby speaking||||social environment||| 蓋比:……還有這座城市的文化。

Lindsay: And also, I would also say to add to that the fact that there are so many people, right – so in New York City, there are 8 million people so you need to actually – it sounds horrible – you need to start to filter out… Gabby: Yeah. ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||筛选出||| ||||would like|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||sounds|||||||filter||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||filtrare fuori||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||lọc bỏ||| Lindsay: Et aussi, je dirais aussi d'ajouter à cela le fait qu'il y a tellement de gens, d'accord - donc à New York, il y a 8 millions de personnes, donc vous devez en fait - ça semble horrible - vous devez commencer à filtrer… Gabby : Ouais. Lindsay:また、非常に多くの人がいるという事実に加えて、ニューヨーク市には800万人の人がいるので、実際に必要なのは恐ろしいことです。フィルターで取り除く…ギャビー:うん。 Lindsay:而且,我還想補充一個事實,那就是有這麼多人,對吧——在紐約市,有 800 萬人,所以你需要實際上——這聽起來很可怕——你需要開始過濾掉… 加比:是的。 Lindsay: …certain people. Lindsay speaking|some|some individuals Lindsay: …ciertas personas. 林賽:……某些人。 So with online dating you're able to specify what you're looking for. |||||||指定|||| |||||||указать|||| Entonces, con las citas en línea, puede especificar lo que está buscando. 因此,透過線上約會,您可以指定您要尋找的內容。

Gabby: And target what you're looking for. |并且|目标|||| ||mục tiêu|||| 蓋比:並瞄準你要尋找的東西。

Lindsay: Filter out and target. |过滤|||目标 Lindsay: filtrar y apuntar. Lindsay:筛选和定位。 Lindsay:過濾掉目標。

Gabby: Yeah. Gabby:是的。

Lindsay: So it kind of works and so the view of online dating from an urban perspective is, in my opinion, totally accepted. |||||||||||||||đô thị||||||| Lindsay : Donc ça marche en quelque sorte et donc la vision des rencontres en ligne d'un point de vue urbain est, à mon avis, totalement acceptée. Lindsay:それは一種の仕事なので、都市の観点からのオンラインデートの見方は、私の意見では完全に受け入れられています。 Lindsay:所以它在某种程度上有效,因此从城市角度来看,我认为在线约会的观点是完全被接受的。 Lindsay:所以這確實有效,所以我認為,從城市角度進行線上約會的觀點是完全可以接受的。

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: But if I were to talk to my friends, who maybe got married earlier or live outside of the city, I think it's a little bit different. Lindsay: Pero si tuviera que hablar con mis amigos, que tal vez se casaron antes o viven fuera de la ciudad, creo que es un poco diferente. Lindsay : Mais si je devais parler à mes amis, qui se sont peut-être mariés plus tôt ou vivent en dehors de la ville, je pense que c'est un peu différent. 琳赛:但是如果我和我的朋友们交流,他们可能早些结婚或者住在城外,我觉得情况会有点不同。 Lindsay:但是如果我和我的朋友們交談,他們可能結婚較早或住在城外,我認為情況有點不同。

Gabby: Right. 加比:对。

And I think several years ago, people didn't wanna (want to) say that they met online. ||||||||想要||||||| 我觉得几年前,人们不愿意承认他们是在网上认识的。 我認為幾年前,人們不想說他們是在網路上認識的。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: It's kind of – it was taboo… ||||||禁忌 ||||||禁じられた 蓋比:有點--這是禁忌…

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: …but I think now it's not really taboo for a lot of people. ||||||||禁忌||||| Gabby:……但我認為現在對很多人來說這並不是真正的禁忌。 That's how they meet and I, I know several people have gotten married… Lindsay: Yeah. Gabby: …and, you know, had like great relationships from meeting someone online. 加比|||||||关系|||| 加比:……而且,你知道,透過在網路上認識某人而建立了良好的關係。

Lindsay: Why not? 林賽:為什麼不呢? I mean it's hard to meet the person that you're really looking for, so if you can give yourself another opportunity, why not? Je veux dire qu'il est difficile de rencontrer la personne que vous recherchez vraiment, alors si vous pouvez vous donner une autre opportunité, pourquoi pas ? 我的意思是,遇到你真正要找的人很難,所以如果你能再給自己一次機會,為什麼不呢?

Gabby: Yeah.

So and uh, making uh profile's a great way to… |||||个人资料的|||| |||||プロフィールの|||| Donc, et euh, créer un profil est un excellent moyen de… 所以呃,製作呃個人資料是一個很好的方法...

Lindsay: Practice your English. 林賽:練習你的英文。

Gabby: And uh exchanging messages with people. Габби|||||| |||交流|消息|| 蓋比:嗯,與人交換資訊。 Again, fun way to practice English. 再一次,這是練習英語的有趣方式。 Some really popular sites right now are OkCupid. |||网站||||OkCupid |||サイト||||オーケーキューピッド 現在一些非常受歡迎的網站是 OkCupid。 I think that one's – I mean it's popular because it's free and um, it's easy to use. 我認為它很受歡迎,因為它是免費的,而且易於使用。 There's (there are) other ones too like eHarmony, Match.com. |||||||eHarmony|| |||||||eHarmony|| 還有其他的,像是 eHarmony、Match.com。

Lindsay: There's a site called HowAboutWe where you can actually say what you wanna (want to) do, so it's more about action, getting out and doing something with the person, rather than talking about who you are and what you like. |||网站||约会网站||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||||||||||||going out|||||||||||||||||| |||||どうかな||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Lindsay : Il existe un site appelé HowAboutWe où vous pouvez réellement dire ce que vous voulez (voulez) faire, donc il s'agit plus d'action, de sortir et de faire quelque chose avec la personne, plutôt que de parler de qui vous êtes et de ce que vous aimez. Lindsay:有一個名為HowAboutWe 的網站,您可以在其中實際說出您想要(想要)做什麼,因此更多的是關於行動,走出去並與該人一起做某事,而不是談論您是誰以及您喜歡什麼。

Gabby: Oh, very cool.

Lindsay: You invite them out. Lindsay:你邀請他們出去。 Let's go walk across a bridge. 我們去走過一座橋吧。

Gabby: Hiking. |Escursionismo.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Let's go for a hike and have dinner. ||||徒步旅行||| ||||поход||| 我們去遠足並吃晚餐吧。

Gabby: Wow!

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: That sounds like fun. I hadn't heard about that one. 我沒聽過那個。

Lindsay: Mm-hm. 林賽:嗯嗯。

Gabby: Um, I know, there's – I mean for every different kind of demographic, like, you know, if you are over 55, right, there is Seniors Meet, so. ||||||||||||人群类别|||||||||||老年人|| ||||||||||||population group||||||||||||| ||||||||||||層|||||||||||高齢者向け|| 加比:嗯,我知道,有 - 我的意思是針對每種不同類型的人口統計,例如,你知道,如果你超過 55 歲,對吧,有老年人聚會,所以。 I mean there's (there are) different kinds of – like there's (there are) religious dating sites as well. ||||||||||||宗教的|||| ||||||||||||||||тоже 我的意思是有不同類型的——例如也有宗教約會網站。 Like if you are a Christian, Muslim, you know, whatever – if you feel strongly about a religion, you can find a site. ||||||穆斯林|||||||强烈地|||宗教信仰||||| ||||||follower of Islam||||||||||||||| ||||||Hồi giáo||||||||||||||| 就像如果你是基督徒、穆斯林,你知道,無論什麼——如果你對某種宗教有強烈的感覺,你就可以找到一個網站。

Lindsay: Definitely.

Gabby: I don't know specific names, but like the most popular just for the general public, I think, are like OkCupid, eHarmony, Match.com. ||||||||||||||||||||OkCupid|eHarmony|| Gabby:我不知道特定的名稱,但我認為最受大眾歡迎的名稱是 OkCupid、eHarmony、Match.com。

Lindsay: Yeah.

For sure.

Interesting. 有趣的。 And then as far as like the way that American people date – I mean generally, what I've seen is that people tend to, um, you know, go out with a few different people three or four times, then you might need tend to, you know, make a decision as to how serious you are about one person and… Et puis en ce qui concerne la façon dont les Américains sortent ensemble - je veux dire en général, ce que j'ai vu, c'est que les gens ont tendance, euh, vous savez, à sortir avec quelques personnes différentes trois ou quatre fois, alors vous pourriez avoir besoin de tendre pour, vous savez, prendre une décision quant à votre sérieux envers une personne et… 至於美國人約會的方式——我的意思是,一般來說,我所看到的是,人們傾向於,嗯,你知道,和幾個不同的人出去三到四次,那麼你可能需要傾向於你知道,決定你對一個人有多認真,然後…

Gabby: One of the – sorry. 蓋比:其中之一——抱歉。 One of the biggest differences between dating in the US and dating in other cultures is dating several people at once. ||||差异|||||||||||||||| |||||||||||uscire insieme||||||||| L'une des plus grandes différences entre les rencontres aux États-Unis et les rencontres dans d'autres cultures est de sortir avec plusieurs personnes à la fois. 在美國約會和在其他文化中約會之間最大的區別之一是同時約會幾個人。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: I mean, the only limit is your time. 蓋比:我的意思是,唯一的限制是你的時間。 Right? You could be dating one, two, three, four, five. 你可以約會一、二、三、四、五。 I don't know. Or how much time you have, but, um, it's, it's very different whereas in other cultures, I get the impression that you date one person at a time. |||||||||||||||||||印象|||||||| |||||||||||||||||||belief|||||||| ||||||||||||mentre invece in||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||一方で||||||||||||||| Или сколько у вас есть времени, но это совсем другое, в то время как в других культурах, как мне кажется, вы встречаетесь с одним человеком за раз. 或者你有多少時間,但是,嗯,這是非常不同的,而在其他文化中,我的印像是你一次約會一個人。

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: But in the US, as you said, I mean, we go on maybe three to five dates… Lindsay: Right. 蓋比:但在美國,正如你所說,我的意思是,我們可能會進行三到五次約會… 林賽:對。 Right.

Gabby: …with different people at the same time. 蓋比:……同時和不同的人在一起。

Lindsay: Yeah.

And it seems like the, just the culture, the action of like going on a date, seems like something that might be unique to American… Gabby: yeah. ||||||||||||||||||||||独特的|||| Et il semble que la, juste la culture, l'action d'aller à un rendez-vous, semble être quelque chose qui pourrait être unique à l'Amérique… Gabby : ouais. 看起來,只是文化,像是約會之類的行為,似乎是美國人獨有的…… 加比:是的。 Lindsay: …but maybe not just American culture, but I think a lot of cultures, other cultures might not do it. Lindsay:……但也許不只是美國文化,我認為很多文化、其他文化可能都不會這樣做。 Right. 正確的。

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: Let's go to a movie and have dinner. Lindsay:我們去看電影然後吃晚餐吧。 Let's go have coffee as a first date. 第一次約會我們去喝咖啡吧。 Right.

Gabby: Right.

Something short and like not, not a big commitment at first. ||||||||小承诺|| 一些簡短的事情,例如不是,一開始並不是一個很大的承諾。 Like maybe you get a drink, or, you know. 就像也許你會喝一杯,或者,你知道。 Um, yeah, something short, like an hour or something. 嗯,是的,很短的時間,像是一個小時之類的。

Lindsay: Easy. Yeah.

Gabby: And then maybe your second date would be a little longer, like dinner or a movie or something like that. 蓋比:然後也許你的第二次約會時間會長一點,像是吃晚餐或看電影之類的。 But generally after, what would you say like four dates, you would… |||cosa|||||||| 但一般來說,在四次約會之後,你會…

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: …you would either continue with that person or kind of nicely let them go. Gabby : … soit vous continueriez avec cette personne, soit vous la laisseriez gentiment partir. 加比:……你要嘛繼續和那個人在一起,要嘛就好好地讓他們離開。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Yeah.

I love the expression ‘let them go.' Gabby: Yeah. 我喜歡「讓他們走」這句話。加比:是的。 Lindsay: Just you would probably think becoming sort of exclusive with that person maybe. |||||||||独占关系|||| |||||||||||||perhaps Lindsay: Juste vous penseriez probablement devenir une sorte d'exclusif avec cette personne peut-être. Lindsay: probabilmente penseresti di diventare una sorta di esclusiva con quella persona. Lindsay:只是你可能會認為與那個人有某種排他性。 Um, oh our parents' generation used to call it ‘going steady,' but we don't really use that term anymore. ||||一代||||||稳定交往|||||||| ||||||||||встречаться|||||||| Euh, oh la génération de nos parents avait l'habitude d'appeler ça "se stabiliser", mais nous n'utilisons plus vraiment ce terme. La generazione dei nostri genitori lo chiamava "fare coppia", ma oggi non si usa più quel termine. 嗯,哦,我們父母那一代曾經稱之為“穩定”,但我們實際上不再使用這個詞了。

Gabby: Well and if you keep going out on dates with someone that you're not interested in, we call that ‘stringing along.' Lindsay: Yeah. ||||||||||||||||||||拖着||| ||||||||||||||||||||leading on||| ||||||||||||||||||||引き延ばす||| ||||||||||||||||||||дразнить||| Gabby: Bueno, y si sigues teniendo citas con alguien que no te interesa, a eso lo llamamos "seguirle el rollo" Lindsay: Sí. Gabby : Eh bien, et si vous continuez à sortir avec quelqu'un qui ne vous intéresse pas, nous appelons cela « faire la queue ». Lindsay : Ouais. Gabby: Beh, e se continui a uscire con qualcuno che non ti interessa, lo chiamiamo "tirare avanti" Lindsay: Sì. ギャビー:そうですね、興味のない人とデートを続けるなら、それを「ひもでつなぐ」と呼びます。リンゼイ:うん。 蓋比:嗯,如果你一直和你不感興趣的人出去約會,我們稱之為「串通」。林賽:是的。 Gabby: Or ‘leading on.' ||leading| Gabby: O "che conduce". 蓋比:或者「引領」。

Lindsay: ‘Leading them on.' |引导|| |leading|| Li ha guidati. Линдси: "Вести их за собой". 林賽:“帶領他們前進。” Yeah, that's a good one. 是的,那是一件好事。

Gabby: And, and so I think in other cultures, there's also this official moment where um, you know, maybe one person would ask, “Do you want to be my girlfriend?” or “Do you want to be my boyfriend?” Lindsay: Or perhaps, um, you know, it's like an official kind of moment, whereas in the US it's – I don't feel like that happens as often. ||||||||||||正式的|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||正式的|||||||||||||||| 加比:我認為在其他文化中,也有這樣一個正式時刻,嗯,你知道,也許有人會問,“你想成為我的女朋友嗎?”或“你想成為我的男朋友嗎?” Lindsay:或者,嗯,你知道,這就像一個官方時刻,而在美國——我覺得這種情況並不常發生。 It could, but it's sometimes um, implied, but it's a little complicated, it's a little messy. ||||||暗示的|||||有点复杂||||混乱的 ||||||suggested||||||||| ||||||暗示される||||||||| |||||||||||||||неаккуратно Ça pourrait, mais c'est parfois euh, sous-entendu, mais c'est un peu compliqué, c'est un peu brouillon. 可以,但有時是隱含的,但有點複雜,有點混亂。 Whaddya (what do you) think about that? 你對此有何看法?

Gabby: Yeah.

Maybe it's just a personal thing, like maybe you would have a talk like “Okay, what's the status of our relationship?” |||||||||||||||||状态||| Peut-être que c'est juste une chose personnelle, comme peut-être que vous auriez une conversation du genre "D'accord, quel est le statut de notre relation?" 也許這只是個人的事情,就像您可能會進行這樣的對話:“好吧,我們的關係狀況如何?”

Lindsay: Yeah, like “What's happening with us? Lindsay : Ouais, comme « Qu'est-ce qui se passe avec nous ? Lindsay:是的,就像「我們發生了什麼事? Like where's the relationship going?” But you might not phrase it in that way, like “Do you wanna (want to) be my boyfriend?” Or you might not say it exactly. 比如說,你們之間的關係將走向何方?”但你可能不會這樣表達,例如“你想(想)成為我的男朋友嗎?”或者你可能沒有說清楚。

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: Yeah.

Yeah.

Gabby: But being exclusive is a popular term and that just means that you're not seeing other people and so you're basically, uh, boyfriend, girlfriend. |||专一交往||||||||||||||||||基本上||| ||being|||||||||||||||||||||| |||付き合っている||||||||||||||||||||| ギャビー:しかし、排他的であることは人気のある用語であり、それはあなたが他の人に会っていないことを意味します、そしてあなたは基本的に、ええと、ボーイフレンド、ガールフレンドです。 蓋比:但是排他性是一個流行的術語,這只是意味著你不和其他人見面,所以你基本上是,呃,男朋友,女朋友。 You know, you're, you're in a relationship, um, but it's, it's not – you may not ask uh, “Do you want to be my whatever?” Vous savez, vous êtes, vous êtes dans une relation, euh, mais c'est, ce n'est pas - vous ne pouvez pas demander euh, "Voulez-vous être mon quoi que ce soit?" 你知道,你正在戀愛,嗯,但事實並非如此——你可能不會問,“你想成為我的什麼嗎?”

Lindsay: Right.

Gabby: So…

Lindsay: Yeah.

Interesting. So we have a lot of strange, um, yeah, traditions and customs in terms of the way we, the way we date. |||||||||传统||习俗|||||||||| 因此,就我們的約會方式而言,我們有許多奇怪的傳統和習俗。

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: Um, anything else we wanted to mention to that end? Lindsay:嗯,為此我們還有什麼想提的嗎?

Gabby: Oh gosh! Well, one, one thing is like when you go out on a date, um, the, the idea of who is supposed to get the check or get the bill – I think that it's changed in recent years. ||||||||||||||||||||||||||get|||||||||| Eh bien, une, une chose, c'est comme quand vous sortez à un rendez-vous, euh, la, l'idée de qui est censé recevoir le chèque ou la facture – je pense que cela a changé ces dernières années. 嗯,一件事就像當你出去約會時,嗯,誰應該收到支票或賬單的想法 - 我認為近年來它發生了變化。 I mean usually, you know, like, like a man and a woman going out, the man would always pick up the tab, pick up the check, or the bill. |||||||||||||||||||||账单||||||| ||||||||||||||||||pick||||pick|||||| |||||||||||||||||||||勘定を払う||||勘定|||勘定 |||||||||||||||||||||счет||||||| Di solito, ad esempio, quando un uomo e una donna escono, l'uomo paga sempre il conto, l'assegno o la fattura. 我的意思是,通常情況下,就像一個男人和一個女人出去一樣,男人總是會拿起帳單、支票或帳單。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Gabby: And I think now the idea of ‘going Dutch' is really popular. |||||||||荷兰||| ||||||||going|Dutch||| ||||||||行くこと|||| Gabby : Et je pense que maintenant l'idée de "devenir néerlandais" est vraiment populaire. Gabby: E credo che ora l'idea di "diventare olandese" sia molto popolare. 蓋比:我認為現在「荷蘭人」的想法非常流行。

Lindsay: Good one.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: So what does that mean?

Gabby: Each person pays for their – well half and half or you pay for what you drank or ate. |||付费||||||||||||||| 蓋比:每個人為自己的錢付錢——好吧,或者你為你喝的或吃的東西付錢。

Lindsay: Right.

Yeah.

Usually I like to go half and half rather than figuring out what everyone got ‘cause (because) it feels so… I don't know…stiff. Gabby: Yeah. ||||||||||想出|||||||||||||生硬的|| |||||||||||||||||||||||formal or rigid|| ||||行く||||||||||||なぜなら|||||||堅苦しい|| Di solito mi piace fare metà e metà piuttosto che capire cosa hanno preso tutti perché (perché) sembra così... non so... rigido. Gabby: Sì. 通常我喜歡一半一半,而不是弄清楚每個人都得到了什麼,因為(因為)感覺如此……我不知道……僵硬。加比:是的。 Lindsay: …to go through “Oh, you ordered this,” and I ordered – but yeah, ‘going Dutch' is just splitting the bill. |||||||||||||||||分摊|| |||||||||||||||||割り勘|| |||||||||||||||||делить|| Lindsay : …de passer par « Oh, tu as commandé ceci », et j'ai commandé – mais oui, « devenir néerlandais » ne fait que diviser la facture. Lindsay:…經過“哦,你點了這個”,我點了——但是,是的,“荷蘭語”只是分攤賬單。 Right. Gabby: And now, I mean there's uh – well women, obviously, are working, we're independent, we can pay for our own, uh, our parts of the dinner or whatever. ||||||||||显然||||独立的|||||||||||||| 正確的。加比:現在,我的意思是,呃——顯然,女性正在工作,我們是獨立的,我們可以支付我們自己的,呃,晚餐的部分費用或其他什麼。 So I think um – it's just kind of – that idea of being equal, um, so that's – and not having any responsibility, you know, to pay for the other person or to feel indebted or anything. ||||||||||||平等||||||||||||||||||||感到欠债|| |||||||||||||||||||any|||||||||||||obligated to repay|| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||恩義を感じる|| Donc je pense euh - c'est juste une sorte de - cette idée d'être égal, euh, donc c'est - et de ne pas avoir la responsabilité, vous savez, de payer pour l'autre personne ou de se sentir redevable ou quoi que ce soit. 所以我認為,嗯——這只是一種——平等的想法,嗯,所以那就是——沒有任何責任,你知道,為他人付錢或感到負債或任何東西。

Lindsay: Which is good.

Gabby: Yeah.

Lindsay: You pay your own way. Lindsay:你自己付錢。 You don't feel like you necessarily have to go out on another date with the person… 你覺得你不一定要跟這個人再出去約會…

Gabby: Right.

Lindsay: …if you didn't like them. Lindsay:……如果你不喜歡它們。 So.

Gabby: But it depends. แก็บบี้: แต่มันขึ้นอยู่กับ||| 蓋比:但這要看情況。 I mean people do things differently, but that's just kind of a general trend, I think. Voglio dire che le persone fanno le cose in modo diverso, ma questa è una tendenza generale, credo. 我的意思是人們做事的方式不同,但我認為這只是一種整體趨勢。

Lindsay: Yeah.

Interesting stuff. |有趣的事物 |面白いこと Interessante. 有趣的東西。 All right. Great. Thanks for having a chat. 感謝您的聊天。

Gabby: Yeah. 加比: 是的。|

Thanks Lindsay. See ya' (you)!

Lindsay: You listeners know that we've created this awesome podcast for you. ||||||制作了||||| Lindsay:各位聽眾知道我們為你們製作了這個很棒的播客。 But that's not all. 但這還不是全部。 We've also created an e-book to help you get the most out of listening to every episode. And the best thing is it's free. It's free for you guys, our listeners. So to get the e-book for free, just come visit us at www.allearsenglish.com/free.

Gabby: Thanks for listening to the All Ears English Podcast. We're here to help you learn English and you can help us by leaving a five star review on iTunes.

See you next time.