Sugar vs Salt (3)
Salt grants us with these super powers
Aromas become awakened
Food is sweeter! Lasts longer! It even tastes better!
And just how do you think we make bacon?
We humans owe so much to salt
In the creation of cities and culture
Salt preserves all our precious food
Saving it from the vultures!
In olden days, salt was very valuable,
And not just for our tongues and tummies.
We traded it for gold! We fought wars over it.
We even used salt as money.
A worker who you cannot fault?
Let's just say they're worth their salt.
A person who's been good since birth?
Those folks are the salt of the earth.
And salts not just for cooking. It's used for many things,
From cleaning cuts to melting ice and snow!
Farmers even use it in soil
To help their fruits and veggies grow!
So let's gather round and raise a toast
To that edible rock which seasons our roasts
From the Great Wall of China to the Ivory Coast,
It's the mineral we dig, the crystal we exalt,
And it all goes by the name of SALT.
Molly: Very lovely. All right Nik, now it's your turn to share a sugar lover's take on Dr. Seuss.
Nik: Each morning I walk down the road to my school
Past the old hardware store and the closed public pool
It's really quite grim, except when I stop
At cheerful Ms. Swizzlestick's sweet candy shop
You can smell her at work, from a mile away
You can hear her clang-banging, and singing all day
She whips up confections, makes marshmallow twirls
Spins long yarns of taffy, strings sweet sugar pearls
Walk in, and you'll see her walls crowded with jars
Filled with yummy-gummies and chocolate bars
But my favorite treat, the best one of all
Are her specialty, Zoop-a-dee-doop-a-dee balls!
What are those, you ask? Well, I wondered the same
Until I decided to ask her one day
“I'll show you!” she said. “Come on, follow me!”
“I'll make you a zoop-a-dee-doop, or three!”
Her kitchen was steamy, her kitchen was sweet!
Her kitchen was noisy, and definitely NOT neat.
She grabbed a big spoon, and a cumbersome pot
Threw in some sugar -- she threw in a LOT!
“Sugar!” She cried, “Is the key to all sweets!”
“It's the star, don't you know, in all Swizzlestick treats.”
Then she measured and mixed at a furious pace
All with a wink and a smile on her Swizzlestick face
I watched her quite close, and took lots of notes
But I couldn't keep up! I'll read what I wrote.
“Three cups of sugar, and two cocoa beans
Choca-oh-boodle? Now, what does that mean?
UNsalted butter, vanilla -- four drops!
Add in some egg whites and cream, plip plop!
Now caramel twirls, and a dish-dash of fudge,
Some nougat. How much? You be the judge.
Now stir, spin and mix it, roll it, make balls!
Don't skimp on the size! They shouldn't be small.”
And that's all I wrote, but it didn't end there,
She threw me a ball, and it soared through the air!
“Open wide!” she cried. My jaw dropped to the floor
Zoop-a-dee-doop! Oh the flavors, galore!
A perfect confection! I'll gobble the rest!
Zoop-a-dee-doop-a-dee balls are the best!
Molly: Such flavor-filled poetry. Kailynn, it's time for you to award a point to whichever side you like best. Have you made your decision?
Kailynn: Yes, I have.
Molly: Excellent. Well, now it's time for the round that's more surprising than the most delicious of dishes. It's the Sneak Attack.
Molly: Your sneak attack challenge is Speed Facts. We want you to deliver as many fascinating sugar and salt facts as you can in a single breath. But quality trumps quantity. So aim for the most exciting facts and clearest delivery. Does that make sense Kenji and Nik?
Kenji: Yes.
Nic: Yes.
Molly: Excellent. We'll give you a few minutes to brainstorm while we listen to some enchanting hold music.
Hold Music: Gimme some honey, gimme some sweets
Cookies and cakes, candy and treats
Sugar makes me happy, sugar makes me glow
Tastes like the ocean makes flavors pop
Every food is better with some salt on top
Table, Himalayan, Kosher, and Sea Salt.
Molly: Nik, Kenji, are you ready?
Kenji: I am as ready as I'll ever be.
Nik: Absolutely ready to get this done.
Molly: Excellent. Well Nik, you're up first this time. Let's hear some sweet, sweet sugar facts. Take a deep breath in and go whenever you're ready.
Nik: All right. Sugar is fermented to make acids. It provides energy, it provides structure to plants and animals, gives us dietary fibers. Sugar is in meteorites, and it is in early life in the form of RNA.
Molly: That was impressive. I think I was holding my breath the entire time. (laughs)
Nik: I didn't think I could do it.
(laughter)
Molly: You did, very nice. (laughs) All right Kenji, your turn.
Kenji: All right.
Molly: On your mark-
Kenji: Okay, ready.
Molly: -get set,
Kenji: (inhales)
Molly: -go.
Kenji: Salt was used as money. Salt was used to make mummies and destroy zombies. Salt is better at masking the flavor of bitter medicine than sugar, so instead of a spoon full of sugar, try using a pinch of salt when you're taking your medicine. Salt comes in a rainbow of colors naturally, unlike sugar which only comes naturally in brown. Throwing salt over your shoulder is good luck. Words like salami salad and even the suffix, which all come from word-- salt.
(laughter)
Oh, I'm sorry. I ran out of breath on the last one.
(laughter)
Molly: That was great.
Kailynn: You guys are pretty good at that.
Molly: Yes. Nicely done both of you.
Kenji: (laughter)
Molly: All right, Kailynn, this is another really tough decision.
Kailynn: (sighs) Geez.
Molly: Which fact attack impress you more? You could rate them on the delivery, the quality of facts, the longest breath, whatever makes sense to you. Have you marked down your point?
Kailynn: Yes. I'm ready.
Molly: Okay. Well, it's all been building to this moment. The last round of this sweet and savory debate battle, it's the Final Six. Debaters, you both have got six more words to sum up the glory of your side. This is your last chance to convince Kailynn that your team is tops. Kenji, let's hear your final six.
Kenji: French fries, potato chips, pepperoni pizza.
(laughter)
Molly: All right Nik, let's hear your final six?
Nik: Sweet, ubiquitous, gastronomy, artistic, rainbows, yams.
Kailynn: Ooh.
(laughter)
He said yams. Oh, geez.
Molly: (groans) That is tough. I think I'm going to end every sentence now with just “yams!” All right, this was a dynamic debate. Both sides really brought their best. Kailynn, now it's up to you. Award the final point. Have you made your decision?
Kailynn: Yes.
Molly: Okay, now tally up all five points you've awarded throughout the debate. Are you ready to crown a winner?
Kailynn: Yes, sadly.
Molly: Drumroll, please.
The winner is--
Kailynn: Kenji.
Molly: Team salt for the win.
Kailynn: It was off by one point.
Molly: It was a very close match-up.
Kailynn: Yes.
(laughter)
Kenji: I would have voted for Nik. I especially love Nik's poem.
Kailynn: Yes. What sold me though was you said french fries and potato chips.
(laughter)
Nik: I mean, they're both carbohydrates.
Molly: True.
(laughter)
Molly: Sugar and salt working together all the time.
Kenji: Yes they do. Yes.
Molly: We really can't have one without the other.
Kailynn: Yes.
Molly: Sugar and salt, teammates for life. Kailynn crowned salt the Smash Boom Best today, but who do you think won?
Kailynn: Let us know if you agree with my verdict. Head to smashboom.org and cast your vote.
Molly: That's it for today's munchy, crunchy, match-up. Smash Boom Best is brought to you by Brains On! and American Public Media.
Nik: It's produced by Molly Bloom, Rosie Dupont, Jennifer Lai, Marc Sanchez, and Sanden Totten.
Kenji: We had engineering help from Cameron Wiley.
Nik: We had production help from Elyssa Dudley, Kristina Lopez, and Menaka Wilhelm.
Molly: Anna Weggel is the voice of our hold music and our announcer is Marley Feuerwerker-Otto. We want to give a special thanks to Austin Cross and Taylor Coffman. Nik, is there anyone you want to give a shoutout to today?
Nik: My mom for letting me eat a lot of ice creams.
(laughter)
Molly: How about you Kenji?
Kenji: Oh, to my daughter Alecia who loves listening to the show.
Molly: (chuckles) Kailynn, do you want to give any special thanks today?
Kailynn: To Nik and Kenji for making it extremely difficult for me to make a choice.
(laughter)
Molly: Awesome, and before we sign off, let's hear some more from Auden. Remember, he suggested the heart versus brain match-up. Here's who he thinks would win.
Auden: I think brain will win because without the brain the heart wouldn't beat.
Molly: Thanks Auden, and if you dreamed up the best debate idea ever, we want to hear about it. You can share your ideas with us or just say hi at smashboom.org. We love hearing from you. We'll be back soon with another debate battle.
Kailynn: See you.
Nik: Later.
Kenji: Bye-bye.
Molly: Ta-ta.
Molly: What's your favorite flavor ice cream? I want to know.
Nik: Lemon. Lemon or passionfruit-
Molly: Oh, yes. Sounds good.
Nik: -with a pinch of salt.
(laughter)
Kenji: You're just squeezing that in there.
(laughter)