#6. Not a Date
MIA: What do you think?
VINCENT: It's like a wax museum with a pulse.
BUDDY: Hi, I'm Buddy, what can I get you?
VINCENT: Let's see, steak, steak, steak. Oh, yeah, I'll have the Douglas Sirk steak.
I'll have that.
BUDDY: How do you want that cooked? Burnt to a crisp, or bloody as hell?
VINCENT: Bloody as hell. And oh, yeah, look at this, vanilla coke.
BUDDY: How about you, Peggy Sue?
MIA: I'll have the Durward Kirby burger – bloody... And a five-dollar shake.
BUDDY: How do you want that shake, Martin and Lewis, or Amos and Andy?
MIA: Martin and Lewis.
VINCENT: Did you just order a five-dollar shake?
MIA: Mh-mmm.
VINCENT: That's a shake? That's milk and ice cream?
MIA: Last I heard.
VINCENT: That's five dollars? You don't put bourbon in it or nothin'?
BUDDY: No.
VINCENT: Just checking.
BUDDY: I'll be right back with your drinks.
MIA: Could you roll me one of those, cowboy?
VINCENT: You can have this one, cowgirl.
MIA: Thanks.
VINCENT: Think nothing of it.
MIA: So, Marsellus said you just got back from Amsterdam.
VINCENT: Sure did.
MIA: How long you were there?
VINCENT: Just over three years.
MIA: I go there about once a year to chill out for a month.
VINCENT: No kiddin'? I didn't know that.
MIA: Why would you?
VINCENT: I heard you did a pilot.
MIA: That was my fifteen minutes.
VINCENT: What was it?
MIA: It was show about a team of female secret agents called Fox Force Five.
VINCENT: What?
MIA: Fox Force Five. Fox, as in we're a bunch of foxy chicks. Force, as in we're a force to be reckoned with. Five, as in there's one... two ... three... four... five of us. There was a blonde one, Somerset O'Neal. She was the leader. The Japanese fox was a kung fu master. The black girl was a demolition expert. French fox' specialty was sex.
VINCENT: What was your specialty?
MIA: Knives. The character I played, Raven McCoy, her background was she was raised by circus performers. According to the show, she was the deadliest woman in the world with a knife. And she knew a zillion old jokes. Her grandfather, an old vaudevillian, taught her. If we would have got picked up, they would have worked in a gimmick where every show I would have told another joke.
VINCENT: Do you know any of them old jokes?
MIA Well, I only got the chance to say one, 'cause we only did one show.
VINCENT: Tell me.
MIA: It's corny.
VINCENT: Don't be that way. Tell me.
MIA: No. You won't like it and I'll be embarrassed.
VINCENT: You'll be embarr... you told it in front of fifty million people and you can't tell it to me? I promise I won't laugh.
MIA: That's what I'm afraid of, Vince .
VINCENT: That's not what I meant. You know it.
MIA: Now I'm defintely not gonna tell you 'cause it's been built up too much.
VINCENT: What a gyp.
BUDDY: Martin and Lewis. Vanilla Coke.
MIA: Mmm. Yummy!
VINCENT: You think I could have a sip of that?
MIA: Be my guest.
VINCENT: I gotta know what a five-dollar shake tastes like.
MIA: You can use my straw. I don't have kooties.
VINCENT: Yeah, but maybe I do.
MIA: Cooties I can handle.
VINCENT: All right. Goddamn!
That's a pretty fuckin' good milk shake.
MIA: Told ya.
VINCENT: I don't know if it's worth five dollars, but it's pretty fuckin' good.
MIA: Don't you hate that?
VINCENT: Hate what?
MIA: Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?
VINCENT: I don't know. That's a good question.
MIA: That's when you know you found somebody really special. When you can just shut the fuck up for a minute, and comfortably share silence.
VINCENT: I don't think we're quite there yet. But don't feel bad, we just met each other.
MIA: Well I'll tell you what, I'm gonna go to the bathroom and powder my nose, while you sit here and think of something to say.
VINCENT: I'll do that.
MIA: I said goddamn! Goddamn!
WOMAN: I need some hair spray.
MIA: Don't you just love it when you come back from to the bathroom to find your food waiting for you?
VINCENT: We're lucky we got anything at all. I don't think Buddy Holly's much of a waiter. Maybe we should've sat in Marilyn Monroe's section.
MIA: Which one? There's two Marilyn Monroes.
VINCENT: No there's not.
VINCENT: That's Marilyn Monroe...
VINCENT: And that's Mamie Van Doren. I don't see Jayne Mansfield, so it must be her night off.
MIA: Pretty smart.
VINCENT: Yeah. I got my moments.
MIA: So, did you think of something to say?
VINCENT: Actually, I did. However, you seem like a really nice person, and I don't want to offend you.
MIA: Oooohhhh, this doesn't sound like usual mindless, boring, getting-to-know- you chit-chat. This sounds like you actually have something to say.
VINCENT: Well, well, I do, I do. But you have to promise not to be offended.
MIA: No, no. You can't promise something like that. I have no idea what you're gonna ask me. So you can go ahead and ask me what you're gonna ask me, and my natural response could be to get offended. Then, through no fault of my own, I woulda broken my promise.
VINCENT: Then let's just forget it.
MIA: That is an impossibility. Trying to forget anything as intriguing as this would be an exercise in futility.
VINCENT: Is that a fact?
MIA: Besides, isn't it more exciting when you don't have permission?
VINCENT: All right, all right. well. Here goes. What do you think about what happened to Antwan?
MIA: Who's Antwan?
VINCENT: Tony Rocky Horror. You know him.
MIA: He fell out of a window.
VINCENT: Well, that's one way to say it. Another way to say it would be, that he was thrown out. Another would be, he was thrown out by Marsellus. And yet even another way is to say he was thrown out of a window by Marsellus because of you.
MIA: Is that a fact?
VINCENT: No, no it's not a fact. It's just what I heard. It's just what I heard.
MIA: Who told you?
VINCENT: They.
MIA: They talk a lot, don't they?
VINCENT: They certainly do. They certainly do.
MIA: Well don't by shy Vincent. What else did they say? VINCENT: I'm not shy.
MIA: Did it involve the F-word?
VINCENT: No, no, no, no, no. They just said that Antwan had given you a foot massage.
MIA: And...?
VINCENT: And- and nothin'. That's it.
MIA: You heard Marsellus threw Tony Rocky Horror out of a four-story window for giving me a foot massage?
VINCENT: Mm-hmm.
MIA: And you believe that?
VINCENT: Well, I mean, at the time I was told, it sounded reasonable.
MIA: Marsellus throwing Tony out of a four story window for massaging my feet seemed reasonable?
VINCENT: No, it seemed excessive. But that doesn't mean it didn't happen. I mean I understand that Marsellus is very protective of you.
MIA: A husband being protective of his wife is one thing. A husband almost killing another man for touching his wife's feet is something else.
VINCENT: But did it happen?
MIA: The only thing Antwan ever touched of mine was my hand, when he shook it at my wedding...
VINCENT: Really?
MIA: The truth is, nobody knows why Marsellus threw Tony out of that four-story window except Marsellus and Tony.
When you little scamps get together, you're worse than a sewing circle.
