Franz Kafka - Metaphomorsis chapter 2
II
Gregor first woke up from his heavy swoon-like sleep in the evening twilight.
He would certainly have woken up soon afterwards without any disturbance, for he felt himself
sufficiently rested and wide awake, although it appeared to him as if a hurried step and
a cautious closing of the door to the hall had aroused him.
Light from the electric street lamps lay pale here and there on the ceiling and on the higher
parts of the furniture, but underneath, around Gregor, it was dark.
He pushed himself slowly toward the door, still groping awkwardly with his feelers,
which he now learned to value for the first time, to check what was happening there.
His left side seemed one single long unpleasantly stretched scar, and he finally had to hobble
on his two rows of legs.
In addition, one small leg had been seriously wounded in the course of the morning incident
— it was almost a miracle that only one had been hurt — and dragged lifelessly behind.
By the door he first noticed what had really lured him there.
It was the smell of something to eat.
A bowl stood there, filled with sweetened milk, in which swam tiny pieces of white bread.
He almost laughed with joy, for he now had a much greater hunger than in the morning,
and he immediately dipped his head almost up to and over his eyes, down into the milk.
But he soon drew it back again in disappointment, not just because it was difficult for him
to eat, on account of his delicate left side — he could eat only if his entire panting
body worked in a coordinated way — but also because the milk, which otherwise was his
favourite drink, and which his sister had certainly placed there for that reason, did
not appeal to him at all.
He turned away from the bowl almost with aversion, and crept back into the middle of the room.
In the living-room, as Gregor saw through the crack in the door, the gas was lit, but
where, on other occasions, at this time of day, his father was accustomed to read the
afternoon newspaper in a loud voice to his mother, and sometimes also to his sister,
at the moment no sound was audible.
Now perhaps this reading aloud, about which his sister had always spoken and written to
him, had recently fallen out of their general routine, but he was so still all around, in
spite of the fact that the apartment was certainly not empty.
What a quiet life the family leads, said Gregor to himself, and as he stared fixedly out in
front of him into the darkness, he felt a great pride that he had been able to provide
such a life in a beautiful apartment like this for his parents and his sister.
But how would things go if now all tranquillity, all prosperity, all contentment should come
to a horrible end?
In order not to lose himself in such thoughts, Gregor preferred to set himself moving, so
he moved up and down in his room.
Once during the long evening one side door and then the other door was opened just a
tiny crack, and quickly closed again.
One presumably needed to come in, but had then thought better of it.
Gregor immediately took up a position by the living-room door, determined to bring in the
hesitant visitor, somehow or other, or at least to find out who it might be.
But now the door was not opened any more, and Gregor waited in vain.
Earlier when the door had been barred they had all wanted to come in to him.
Now when he had opened one door, and when the others had obviously been opened during
the day, no one came any more, and the keys were stuck in the locks on the outside.
The light in the living-room was turned off only late at night, and now it was easy to
establish that his parents and his sister had stayed awake all this time, for one could
hear clearly as all three moved away on tiptoe.
Now it was certain that no one would come in to Gregor any more until the morning.
Thus he had a long time to think undisturbed about how he should reorganize his life from
scratch.
But the high open room in which he was compelled to lie flat on the floor made him anxious,
without his being able to figure out the reason, for he had lived in the room for five years.
With a half-unconscious turn, and not without a slight shame, he scurried under the couch,
where, in spite of the fact that his back was a little too cramped, and he could no
longer lift his head, he felt very comfortable, and was sorry only that his body was too wide
to fit completely under it.
There he remained the entire night, which he spent partly in a state of semi-sleep,
out of which his hunger constantly woke him with a start, but partly in a state of worry
and murky hopes, which all led to the conclusion that for the time being he would have to keep
calm, and with patience, and the greatest consideration for his family, tolerate the
troubles which in his present condition he was now forced to cause them.
Already early in the morning, it was still almost night, Gregor had an opportunity to
test the power of the decisions he had just made, for his sister, almost fully dressed,
opened the door from the hall into his room, and looked eagerly inside.
She did not find him immediately, but when she noticed him under the couch—God! he
had to be somewhere or other, for he could hardly fly away!—she got such a shock, that,
without being able to control herself, she slammed the door shut once again from the
outside.
However, as if she was sorry for her behaviour, she immediately opened the door again, and
walked in on her tiptoes, as if she was in the presence of a serious invalid or a total
stranger.
Gregor had pushed his head forward just to the edge of the couch, and was observing her.
Would she really notice that he had left the milk standing, not indeed from any lack of
hunger, and would she bring in something else to eat more suitable for him?
If she did not do it on her own, he would sooner starve to death than call her attention
to the fact, although he had a really powerful urge to move beyond the couch, throw himself
at his sister's feet, and beg her for something or other good to eat.
But his sister noticed right away, with astonishment, that the bowl was still full, with only a
little milk spilled around it.
She picked it up immediately, although not with her bare hands, but with a rag, and took
it out of the room.
Gregor was extremely curious what she would bring as a substitute, and he pictured to
himself different ideas about it.
But he never could have guessed what his sister, out of the goodness of her heart, in fact
did.
She brought him, to taste his test, an entire selection, all spread out on an old newspaper.
There were half-rotten vegetables, bones with the evening meal, covered with a white sauce
which had almost solidified, some raisins and almonds, cheese which Gregor had declared
inedible two days earlier, a slice of dry bread, and a slice of salted bread smeared
with butter.
In addition to all this, she put down a bowl, probably designated once and for all as Gregor's,
into which she poured some water.
And out of her delicacy of feeling, since she knew that Gregor would not eat in front
of her, she went away very quickly, and even turned the key in the lock, so that Gregor
would now observe that he could make himself as comfortable as he wished.
Gregor's small limbs buzzed now that the time for eating had come.
His wounds must, in any case, have already healed completely.
He felt no handicap on that score.
He was astonished at that, and thought about how, more than a month ago, he had cut his
finger slightly with a knife, and how this wound had hurt enough even the day before
yesterday.
Am I now going to be less sensitive? he thought, already sucking greedily on the cheese, which
had strongly attracted him right away, more than all the other foods.
Slowly and with his eyes watering with satisfaction, he ate one after the other the cheese, the
vegetables, and the sauce.
The fresh food, by contrast, didn't taste good to him.
He couldn't bear the smell, and even carried the things he wanted to eat a little distance
away.
By the time his sister slowly turned the key as a sign that he should withdraw, he was
long finished, and now lay lazily in the same spot.
The noise immediately startled him, in spite of the fact that he was already almost asleep,
and he scurried back again under the couch.
But it cost him great self-control to remain under the couch even for the short time his
sister was in the room, because his body had filled out somewhat on account of the rich
meal, and in the narrow space there he could scarcely breathe.
In the midst of minor attacks of asphyxiation, he looked at her with somewhat protruding
eyes, as his unsuspecting sister swept up with a broom not just the remnants, but even
the foods which Gregor had not touched at all, as if these were also now useless, and
as she dumped everything quickly into a bucket, which she closed with a wooden lid, and then
carried all of it out of the room.
She had hardly turned round before Gregor had already dragged himself out from the couch,
stretched out, and let his body expand.
In this way Gregor got his food every day, once in the morning, when his parents and
the servant-girl were still asleep, and a second time after the common noon meal, for
his parents were, as before, asleep then for a little while, and the servant-girl was sent
off by his sister on some errand or other.
They certainly would not have wanted Gregor to starve to death, but perhaps they could
not have endured finding out what he ate other than by hearsay.
Perhaps his sister wanted to spare them what was possibly only a small grief, for they
were really suffering quite enough already.
What sorts of excuses people had used on that first morning to get the doctor and the locksmith
out of the house, Gregor was completely unable to ascertain.
Since they could not understand him, no one, not even his sister, thought that he might
be able to understand others, and thus when his sister was in her room he had to be content
with listening now and then to her sighs and invocations to the saints.
Only later, when she had grown somewhat accustomed to everything—naturally there could never
be any talk of her growing completely accustomed to it—Gregor sometimes caught a comment
which was intended to be friendly, or could be interpreted as such.
Well, to-day it tasted good to him, she said, if Gregor had really cleaned up what he had
to eat, whereas in the reverse situation, which gradually repeated itself more and more
frequently, she used to say sadly, Now everything has stopped again.
But while Gregor could get no new information directly, he did hear a good deal from the
room next door, and as soon as he heard voices he scurried right away to the appropriate
door and pressed his entire body against it.
In the early days especially there was no conversation which was not concerned with
him in some way or other, even if only in secret.
For two days at all mealtimes discussions on that subject could be heard on how people
should now behave, but they also talked about the same subject in the times between meals,
for there were always at least two family members at home, since no one really wanted
to remain in the house alone, and people could not under any circumstances leave the apartment
completely empty.
In addition, on the very first day the servant-girl—it was not completely clear what and how much
she knew about what had happened—on her knees had begged his mother to let her go
immediately, and when she said good-bye about fifteen minutes later, she thanked them for
the dismissal with tears in her eyes, as if she was receiving the greatest favour which
people had shown her there, and without any one demanding it from her, she swore a fearful
oath not to betray any one, not even the slightest bit.
Now his sister had to team up with his mother to do the cooking, although that didn't create
much trouble, because people were eating almost nothing.
Again and again Gregor listened as one of them vainly invited another one to eat, and
received no answer other than,
"'Thank you, I've had enough,' or something like that.
And perhaps they had stopped having anything to drink, too.
His sister often asked his father whether he wanted to have a beer, and gladly offered
to fetch it herself, and when his father was silent, she said, in order to remove any reservations
he might have, that she could send the caretaker's wife to get it.
But then his father finally said a resounding,
"'No,' and nothing more would be spoken about it.
Already during the first day his father laid out all the financial circumstances and prospects
to his mother, and to his sister as well.
From time to time he stood up from the table and pulled out of the small lock-box salvaged
from his business, which had collapsed five years previously, some document or other,
or some notebook.
The sound was audible as he opened up the complicated lock, and after removing what
he was looking for, locked it up again.
These explanations by his father were, in part, the first enjoyable thing that Gregor
had the chance to listen to since his imprisonment.
He had thought that nothing at all was left over for his father from that business.
At least his father had told him nothing to contradict that view, and Gregor, in any case,
hadn't asked him about it.
At the time, Gregor's only concern had been to use everything he had in order to allow
his family to forget as quickly as possible the business misfortune which had brought
them all into a state of complete hopelessness.
And so, at that point, he'd started to work with a special intensity, and from an assistant
had become, almost overnight, a travelling salesman, who naturally had entirely different
possibilities for earning money, and whose successes at work were converted immediately
into the form of cash commissions, which could be set out on the table at home in front
of his astonished and delighted family.
Those had been beautiful days, and they had never come back afterwards, at least not with
the same splendour, in spite of the fact that Gregor later earned so much money that he
was in a position to bear the expenses of the entire family, costs which he, in fact,
did bear.
They had become quite accustomed to it, both the family and Gregor as well.
They took the money with thanks, and he happily surrendered it.
But the special warmth was no longer present.
Only the sister had remained still close to Gregor, and it was his secret plan to send
her next year to the conservatory, regardless of the great expense which that necessarily
involved and which would be made up in other ways.
In contrast to Gregor, she loved music very much, and knew how to play the violin charmingly.
Now and then, during Gregor's short stays in the city, the conservatory was mentioned
in conversations with his sister, but always only as a beautiful dream, whose realization
was unimaginable, and their parents never listened to these innocent expectations with
pleasure.
But Gregor thought about them with scrupulous consideration, and intended to explain the
matter ceremoniously on Christmas Eve.
In his present situation, such futile ideas went through his head, while he pushed himself
right up against the door and listened.
Sometimes in his general exhaustion he couldn't listen any more, and let his head bang listlessly
against the door.
But he immediately pulled himself together, for even the small sound which he made by
this motion was heard nearby, and silenced everyone.
"'There he goes on again,' said his father after a while, clearly turning towards the
door, and only then would the interrupted conversation gradually be resumed again.
Gregor found out clearly enough, for his father tended to repeat himself often in his explanations,
partly because he had not personally concerned himself with these matters for a long time
now, and partly also because his mother did not understand everything right away the first
time, that in spite of all bad luck, a fortune, although a very small one, was available from
the old times, which the interest, which had not been touched, had in the intervening time
gradually allowed to increase a little.
Furthermore, in addition to this, the money which Gregor had brought home every month
— he had kept only a few florins for himself — had not been completely spent, and had
grown into a small capital amount.
Gregor, behind his door, nodded eagerly, rejoicing over this unanticipated foresight and frugality.
True, with this excess money he could have paid off more of his father's debt to his
father, and the day on which he could be rid of this position would have been a lot
closer, but now things were doubtless better the way his father had arranged them.
At the moment, however, this money was not nearly sufficient to permit the family to
live on the interest payments.
Perhaps it would be enough to maintain the family for one or at most two years, that's
all.
Thus it only added up to an amount which one should not really draw upon, and which must
be set aside for an emergency.
But the money to live on had to be earned.
Now although his father was old, he was a healthy man who had not worked at all for
five years, and thus could not be counted on for very much.
He had, in those five years, the first holidays of his trouble-filled but unsuccessful life,
put on a good deal of fat, and thus had become really heavy.
And should his old mother now perhaps work for money, a woman who suffered from asthma,
for whom wandering through the apartment even now was a great strain, and who spent every
second day on the sofa by the open window, laboring for breath?
Should his sister earn money, a girl who was still a seventeen-year-old child, whose earlier
lifestyle had been so very delightful, that it had consisted of dressing herself nicely,
sleeping in late, helping around the house, taking part in a few modest enjoyments, and
above all playing the violin?
When it came to talking about this need to earn money, at first Gregor went away from
the door, and threw himself on the coal-leather sofa beside the door, for he was quite hot
from shame and sorrow.
Often he lay there all night long.
He didn't sleep a moment, and just scratched on the leather for hours at a time.
He undertook the very difficult task of shoving a chair over to the window.
Then he crept up on the window-sill, and braced in the chair, leaned against the window to
look out, obviously with some memory or other of the satisfaction which that used to bring
him in earlier times.
Actually from day to day he perceived things with less and less clarity, even those a short
distance away.
The hospital across the street, the all too frequent sight of which he had previously
cursed, was not visible at all any more, and if he had not been precisely aware that he
lived in the quiet but completely urban Charlotte Street, he would have believed that from his
window he was peering out at a featureless wasteland, in which the grey heaven and the
grey earth had merged, and were indistinguishable.
His attentive sister must have observed a couple of times that the chair stood by the
window.
Then, after cleaning up the room, each time she pushed the chair back right against the
window, and from now on she even left the inner casement open.
If Gregor had only been able to speak to his sister and thank her for everything that she
did for him, he would have tolerated her service more easily.
As it was, he suffered under it.
The sister admittedly sought to cover up the awkwardness of everything as much as possible,
and as time went by she naturally got more successful at it.
But with the passing of time Gregor also came to understand everything more precisely.
Even her entrance was terrible for him.
As soon as she entered she ran straight to the window, without taking the time to shut
the door, in spite of the fact that she was otherwise very considerate in sparing anyone
the sight of Gregor's room, and yanked the window open with eager hands, as if she was
almost suffocating, and remained for a while by the window breathing deeply, even when
it was still so cold.
With this running and noise she frightened Gregor twice every day.
The entire time he trembled under the couch, and yet he knew very well that she would certainly
have spared him gladly if it had only been possible to remain with the window closed
where Gregor lived.
On one occasion—about one month had already gone by since Gregor's transformation, and
there was now no particular reason any more for his sister to be startled at Gregor's
appearance—she arrived a little earlier than usual, and came upon Gregor as he was
still looking out the window, immobile and well-positioned to frighten someone.
It would not have come as a surprise to Gregor if she had not come in, since his position
was preventing her from opening the window immediately.
But she not only did not step inside, she even retreated, and shut the door.
A stranger really might have concluded from this that Gregor had been lying in wait for
her, and wanted to bite her.
Of course, Gregor immediately concealed himself under the couch, but he had to wait until
the noon meal before his sister returned, and she seemed much less calm than usual.
From this he realized that his appearance was still constantly intolerable to her, and
must remain intolerable in future, and that she really had to exert a lot of self-control
not to run away from a glimpse of only one small part of his body, which stuck out from
under the couch.
In order to spare her even this sight, one day he dragged the sheet on his back and onto
the couch.
This task took him four hours, and arranged it in such a way that he was now completely
concealed, and his sister, even if she bent down, could not see him.
If this sheet was not necessary as far as she was concerned, then she could remove it,
for it was clear enough that Gregor could not derive any pleasure from isolating himself
away so completely.
Then she left the sheet just as it was, and Gregor believed he even caught a look of gratitude,
when on one occasion he carefully lifted up the sheet a little with his head to check,
as his sister took stock of the new arrangement.
In the first two weeks his parents could not bring themselves to visit him, and he often
heard how they fully acknowledged his sister's present work, whereas earlier they had often
got annoyed at his sister, because she had seemed to them a somewhat useless young woman.
However, now both his father and his mother often waited in front of Gregor's door while
his sister cleaned up inside, and as soon as she came out she had to explain in detail
how things looked in the room, what Gregor had eaten, how he had behaved this time, and
whether perhaps a slight improvement was perceptible.
In any event, his mother comparatively soon wanted to visit Gregor, but his father and
his sister restrained her, at first with reasons which Gregor listened to very attentively,
and which he completely endorsed.
Later however they had to hold her back forcefully, and when she then cried,
"'Let me go to Gregor!
He's my unlucky son!
Don't you understand that I have to go to him?'
Gregor then thought that perhaps it would be a good thing if his mother came in, not
every day of course, but maybe once a week.
She understood everything much better than his sister, who, in spite of all her courage,
was still a child, and in the last analysis had perhaps undertaken such a difficult task
only out of childish recklessness.
Gregor's wish to see his mother was soon realized, while during the day Gregor, out of consideration
for his parents, did not want to show himself by the window, he couldn't crawl around very
much on the few square meters of the floor.
He found it difficult to bear lying quietly during the night, and soon eating no longer
gave him the slightest pleasure.
So for diversion he acquired the habit of crawling back and forth across the walls and
ceiling.
He was especially fond of hanging from the ceiling.
The experience was quite different from lying on the floor.
It was easier to breathe.
A slight vibration went through his body, and in the midst of the almost happy amusement
which Gregor found up there, it could happen that, to his own surprise, he let go and hit
the floor.
However, now he naturally controlled his body quite differently, and he did not injure himself
in such a great fall.
His sister noticed immediately the new amusement which Gregor had found for himself, for as
he crept around he left behind here and there traces of his sticky stuff, and so she got
the idea of making Gregor's creeping around as easy as possible, and thus of removing
the furniture which got in the way, especially the chest of drawers and the writing-desk.
But she was in no position to do this by herself.
She did not dare to ask her father to help, and the servant-girl would certainly not have
assisted her, for although this girl, about sixteen years old, had courageously remained
since the dismissal of the previous cook, she had begged for the privilege of being
allowed to stay permanently confined in the kitchen, and of having to open the door only
in answer to a special summons.
Thus her sister had no other choice but to involve his mother, while his father was absent.
His mother approached Gregor's room with cries of excited joy, but she fell silent
at the door.
Of course his sister first checked whether everything in the room was in order.
Only then did she let his mother walk in.
In great haste Gregor had drawn the sheet down even further, and wrinkled it more.
The whole thing really looked just like a coverlet thrown carelessly over the couch.
On this occasion Gregor held back from spying out from under the sheet.
Thus he refrained from looking at his mother this time, and was just happy that she had
come.
"'Come on, he's not visible,' said his sister, and evidently led his mother by the
hand.
Now Gregor listened, as these two weak women shifted the still heavy old chest of drawers
from its position, and as his sister constantly took on herself the greater part of the work,
without listening to the warnings of his mother, who was afraid that she would strain herself.
The work lasted a long time.
After about a quarter of an hour had already gone by, his mother said it would be better
if they left the chest of drawers where it was, because, in the first place, it was too
heavy.
They would not be finished before his father's arrival, and leaving the chest of drawers
in the middle of the room would block all Gregor's pathways.
But in the second place, they could not be certain that Gregor would be pleased with
the removal of the furniture.
To her the reverse seemed to be true.
The sight of the empty walls pierced her right to the heart.
And why should Gregor not feel the same, since he had been accustomed to the room furnishings
for a long time, and in an empty room would feel himself abandoned?
And is it not the case?' his mother concluded very quietly, almost whispering, as if she
wished to prevent Gregor, whose exact location she really didn't know, from hearing even
the sound of her voice, for she was convinced that he did not understand her words.
"'And isn't it a fact that by removing the furniture we are showing that we are giving
up all hope of an improvement, and are leaving him to his own resources without any consideration?
I think it would be best if we tried to keep the room exactly in the condition it was in
before, so that, when Gregor returns to us, he finds everything unchanged, and can forget
the intervening time all the more easily.'
As he heard his mother's words, Gregor realized that the lack of all immediate human contact,
together with the monotonous life surrounded by the family over the course of these two
months, must have confused his understanding, because otherwise he couldn't explain to himself
how he, in all seriousness, could have been so keen to have his room emptied.
Was he really eager to let the warm room, comfortably furnished with pieces he had inherited,
be turned into a cavern, in which he would, of course, then be able to crawl about in
all directions without disturbance, but at the same time with a quick and complete forgetting
of his human past as well?
Was he then, at this point, already on the verge of forgetting, and was it only the voice
of his mother, which he had not heard for a long time, that aroused him?
Nothing was to be removed, everything must remain.
In his condition he could not function without the beneficial influences of his furniture,
and if the furniture prevented him from carrying out his senseless crawling about all over
the place, then there was no harm in that, but rather a great benefit.
But his sister unfortunately thought otherwise.
She had grown accustomed, certainly not without justification, so far as the discussion of
matters concerning Gregor was concerned, to act as a special expert with respect to their
parents, and so how the mother's advice was for his sister sufficient reason to insist
on the removal, not only of the chest of drawers and the writing-desk, which were the
only items she had thought about at first, but also of all the furniture, with the exception
of the indispensable couch.
Of course it was not only childish defiance and her recent very unexpected and hard-won
self-confidence which led her to this demand, she had also actually observed that Gregor
needed a great deal of room to creep about.
The furniture, on the other hand, as far as one could see, was not of the slightest
use.
But perhaps the enthusiastic sensibility of young women of her age also played a role.
This feeling sought release at every opportunity, and with it Greta now felt tempted to want
to make Gregor's situation even more terrifying, so that then she would be able to do even
more for him than now.
For surely no one except Greta would ever trust themselves to enter a room in which
Gregor ruled the empty walls all by himself.
And so she did not let herself be dissuaded from her decision by her mother, who in this
room seemed uncertain of herself in her sheer agitation, and soon kept quiet, helping his
sister with all her energy to get the chest of drawers out of the room.
Now Gregor could still do without the chest of drawers if need be, but the writing-desk
really had to stay, and scarcely had the women left the room with the chest of drawers, groaning
as they pushed it, when Gregor stuck his head out from under the sofa to take a look how
he could intervene cautiously and with as much consideration as possible.
But unfortunately it was his mother who came back into the room first, while Greta had
her arms wrapped round the chest of drawers in the next room, and was rocking it back
and forth by herself, without moving it from its position.
His mother was not used to the sight of Gregor.
He could have made her ill, and so, frightened, Gregor scurried backwards right to the other
end of the sofa, but he could no longer prevent the sheet from moving forward a little.
That was enough to catch his mother's attention.
She came to a halt, stood still for a moment, and then went back to Greta.
Although Gregor kept repeating to himself over and over that really nothing unusual
was going on, that only a few pieces of furniture were being rearranged, he soon had to admit
to himself that the movements of the women to and fro, their quiet conversations, and
the scratching of the furniture on the floor, affected him like a great swollen commotion
on all sides.
And so firmly was he pulling in his head and legs, and pressing his body into the floor,
he had to tell himself unequivocally that he wouldn't be able to endure all this much
longer.
They were cleaning out his room, taking away from him everything he cherished.
They had already dragged out the chest of drawers in which the fret, saw, and other
tools were kept, and they were now loosening the writing-desk, which was fixed tight to
the floor, the desk in which he, as a business student, a school student, indeed even as
an elementary school student, had written out his assignments.
At that moment he really didn't have any more time to check the good intentions of the two
women, whose existence he had, in any case, almost forgotten, because in their exhaustion
they were working really silently, and the heavy stumbling of their feet was the only
sound to be heard.
And so he scuttled out.
The women were just propping themselves up on the writing-desk in the next room in order
to take a breather, changing the direction of his path four times.
He really didn't know what he should rescue first.
Then he saw hanging conspicuously on the wall, which was otherwise already empty, the picture
of the woman dressed in nothing but fur.
He quickly scurried up over it, and pressed himself against the glass which held it in
place, and which made his hot abdomen feel good.
At least this picture, which Gregor at the moment completely concealed, surely no one
would now take away.
He twisted his head towards the door of the living-room to observe the women as they came
back in.
They had not allowed themselves very much rest, and were coming back right away.
Greta had placed her arm round her mother and held her tightly.
So what shall we take now? said Greta, and looked round her.
Then her glance met Gregor's from the wall.
She kept her composure only because her mother was there.
She bent her face towards her mother in order to prevent her from looking round, and said,
although in a trembling voice and too quickly,
Come, wouldn't it be better to go back to the living-room for just another moment?
Greta's purpose was clear to Gregor.
She wanted to bring his mother to a safe place, and then chase him down from the wall.
Well, let her just try.
He squatted on his picture, and did not hand it over.
He would sooner spring into Greta's face.
But Greta's words had immediately made the mother very uneasy.
She walked to the side, caught sight of the enormous brown splotch on the floured wallpaper,
and before she became truly aware that what she was looking at was Gregor, screamed out
in a high-pitched raw voice,
Oh, God!
and fell, with outstretched arms, as if she was surrendering everything, down on to the
couch, and lay there motionless.
Gregor, you! cried out his sister, with a raised fist and an urgent glare.
As his transformation, these were the first words which she had directed right at him.
She ran into the room next door, to bring some spirits or other, with which she could
revive her mother from her fainting spell.
Gregor wanted to help as well.
There was time enough to save the picture.
But he was stuck fast on the glass, and had to tear himself loose forcefully.
Then he also scurried into the next room, as if he could give his sister some advice,
as in earlier times.
But then he had to stand there idly behind her, while she rummaged about among various
small bottles.
Still she was frightened when she turned around.
A bottle fell on to the floor and shattered.
A splinter of glass wounded Gregor in the face.
Some corrosive medicine or other dripped over him.
Now, without lingering any longer, Gregor took as many small bottles as she could hold,
and ran with them into her mother.
She slammed the door shut with her foot.
Gregor was now shut off from his mother, who was perhaps near death thanks to him.
He could not open the door, and he did not want to chase away his sister, who had to
remain with her mother.
At this point he had nothing to do but wait, and, overwhelmed with self-reproach and worry,
He began to creep and crawl over everything—walls, furniture, and ceiling.
Finally in his despair, as the entire room started to spin around him, he fell into the
middle of a large table.
A short time elapsed.
Gregor lay there limply.
All around was still.
Perhaps that was a good sign.
Then there was a ring at the door.
The servant girl was naturally shut up in her kitchen, and therefore Gregor had to go
to open the door.
The father had arrived.
"'Gregor, what's happened?' were his first words.
Gregor's appearance had told him everything.
Gregor replied with a dull voice.
Evidently she was pressing her face into her father's chest.
"'Mother fainted, but she's getting better now.
Gregor has broken loose.'
"'Yes, I have expected that,' said his father.
I always told you that, but you women don't want to listen.'
It was clear to Gregor that his father had badly misunderstood Greta's short message,
and was assuming that Gregor had committed some violent crime or other.
Thus Gregor now had to find his father to calm him down, for he had neither the time
nor the ability to explain things to him.
Even so he rushed away to the door of his room, and pushed himself against it, so that
his father could see right away as he entered from the hall that Gregor fully intended to
return at once to his room, that it was not necessary to drive him back, but that one
only needed to open the door, and he would disappear immediately.
But his father was not in the mood to observe such niceties.
"'Ah!' he yelled as soon as he entered, with a tone as if he were all at once angry and
pleased.
Gregor pulled his head back from the door and raised it in the direction of his father.
He had not really pictured his father as he now stood there.
Of course, what with his new style of creeping all around, he had in the past while neglected
to pay attention to what was going on in the rest of the apartment as he had done before,
and really should have grasped the fact that he would encounter different conditions.
Nevertheless, was that still his father?
Was that the same man who had lain exhausted and buried in bed in earlier days when Gregor
was setting out on a business trip, who had received him on the evenings of his return
in a sleeping-gown and arm-chair, totally incapable of standing up, who had only lifted
his arm as a sign of happiness, and who in their rare strolls together a few Sundays
a year and on the important holidays, made his way slowly forwards between Gregor and
his mother, who sometimes moved slowly, always a bit more slowly than them, bundled up in
his old coat, all the time setting down his walking-stick carefully, and who, when he
had wanted to say something, almost always stood still and gathered his entourage around
him.
But now he was standing up really straight, dressed in a tight-fitting blue uniform with
gold buttons, like the ones servants wear in a banking company.
Above the high stiff collar of his jackets his firm double chin stuck out prominently.
Beneath his bushy eyebrows the glance of his black eyes was freshly penetrating and alert.
His otherwise dishevelled white hair was combed down into a carefully exact shining
part.
He threw his cap, on which a gold monogram, apparently the symbol of the bank, was affixed,
in an arc across the entire room onto the sofa, and moved, throwing back the edge of
the long coat of his uniform, with his hands in his trouser pockets, and a grim face, right
up to Gregor.
He really didn't know what he had in mind, but he raised his foot uncommonly high anyway,
and Gregor was astonished at the gigantic size of the sole of his boot.
However, he did not linger on that point, for he knew from the first day of his new
life that, as far as he was concerned, his father considered the greatest force the only
appropriate response.
And so he scurried away from his father, stopped when his father remained standing, and scampered
forward again when his father merely stirred.
In this way they made their way around the room, repeatedly, without anything decisive
taking place.
In fact, because of the slow pace, it didn't look like a chase.
Gregor remained on the floor for the time being, especially since he was afraid that
his father could take a flight up onto the wall or the ceiling as an act of real malice.
At any event, Gregor had to tell himself that he couldn't keep up this running around for
a long time, because whenever his father took a single step he had to go through an
enormous number of movements.
Already he was starting to suffer from a shortage of breath, just as in his earlier days when
his lungs had been quite unreliable.
As he now staggered around in this way in order to gather all his energies for running,
hardly keeping his eyes open, and feeling so listless that he had no notion at all of
any escape other than by running, and had almost already forgotten that the walls were
available to him, although they were obstructed by carefully carved furniture full of sharp
points and spikes, at that moment something or other thrown casually flew down close by
and rolled in front of him.
It was an apple.
Immediately a second one flew after it.
Gregor stood still in fright.
The running away was useless, for his father had decided to bombard him.
From the fruit-bowl on the sideboard his father had filled his pockets, and now, without for
the moment taking accurate aim, he was throwing apple after apple.
These small red apples rolled around on the floor as if electrified, and collided with
each other.
A weakly thrown apple grazed Gregor's back, but skidded off harmlessly.
However, another one thrown immediately after that one drove into Gregor's back really hard.
Gregor wanted to drag himself off, as if the unexpected and incredible pain would go away
if he changed his position, but he felt as if he was nailed in place, and lay stretched
out completely confused in all his senses.
Only with his final glance did he notice how the door of his room was pulled open, and
how, right in front of his sister, who was yelling, his mother ran out in her undergarments,
for his sister had undressed her in order to give her some freedom to breathe in her
fainting spell, and how his mother then ran up to his father, on the way her tied-up skirts
slipped toward the floor one after the other, and how, tripping over her skirts, she hurled
herself on to his father, and throwing her arms around him in complete union with him.
But at this moment Gregor's powers of sight gave way, as her hands reached to the back
of her father's head, and she begged him to spare Gregor's life.
End of chapter 2