Friends S03E07 1d
So I told Carl, nobody, no matter how famous their parents are... ...is allowed to climb on the dinosaur. But, of course, it went right in one ear... I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint, I can pretend he's Alan Alda. Oh, good. Another dinosaur story. When are those gonna become extinct ? If I was a superhero who could fly and be invisible... ... that would be the best. What does Rachel see in this guy ? I love Rachel. I wish she was my wife. Who's singing ? The One With the Race Car Bed When you guys were kids and you played Happy Days... ...who were you ? I was Richie. I was always Joanie. Question : Was "Egg the Gellers !" The war cry of your neighborhood ? - It's the Mattress King ! - Don't look, honey. Change the channel ! Wait ! I wanna see this ! After I divorce him... ...half of that kingdom is gonna be mine ! Despair fills the mattress show room. My kingdom is suddenly without a queen. I'm so depressed... ... I'm going to slash... ... my prices ! Check it out ! 599 for a California king ! 499 for a pillow-top queen set ! I'm going medieval on prices ! What a wank ! I cannot believe he's using our divorce to sell mattresses ! I know. At 499 for a pillow-top queen, who cares about the divorce ? Those babies will sell themselves ! And I'm appalled for you, by the way. I'm close ! I'm cheap ! I'm the King ! [UNCUT] He stuffs that codpiece, right ? [UNCUT] Oh, yeah. [UNCUT] Okay, here you go. [UNCUT] You know what ? [UNCUT] I asked for no cinnamon on top. Okay, Daddy. We'll see you tomorrow night. Okay, bye. "We" ? - Are having dinner with my Dad tomorrow night. I hope that's okay. Oh, shoot ! Tomorrow's not good. I'm supposed to fall off the Empire State Building... ...and land on a bicycle with no seat, so... Ross, my father doesn't hate you. Please. He refers to me as "Wet-Head." Honey, he calls everybody by a nickname. I know. Just one dinner. One night. For me. Please ? I just want him to love you like I do. All right. Well, not exactly like I do. But if you do come to dinner... ...l'll love you like I do in that black thing that you like. I'll go. - Fine. - Thank you. Hi, Gunther. Yeah. We'll see. Hey, you guys ! - Guess what. - What ? - I got a gig ! - Great ! See, that's why I could never be an actor. I can't say "gig." I can't say "croissant." Oh, my God ! - What's the part ? - It's not a part. I'm teaching Acting for Soap Operas at the Learning Extension. Come on ! That's great ! It's, like, my chance to give something back... ...to the acting community. You're probably not allowed to sleep with any of your students. I know. I don't know, Monica. It feels funny just being here. I mean, if you buy a bed from Janice's ex-husband... ...that's like betraying Chandler. Not at these prices ! You know, in England this car would be on the other side of the store. Phoebe. Come here. This is my new bed ! You gotta feel this bad boy ! Monica, it still feels so weird, you know ? Chandler's your friend. Oh, my God ! All right, take this bed. You can make other friends. Good evening. I am Mr. Tribbiani. And I'll be teaching Acting for Soap Operas. [UNCUT] Unfortunately, tonight will be my only class... [UNCUT] ...because due to a rare blood disease I only have two weeks to live. [UNCUT] So do we get our deposit back ? [UNCUT] That was supposed to be an example of acting for soap operas. [UNCUT] Then why are you only teaching tonight ? [UNCUT] I'm not. Look, why don't we get straight to the lesson, okay ? Now... ...on my first day as Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days of Our Lives... ...I learned one of the most important things in soap opera acting... ...is reacting. This does not mean acting again. It means you don't have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes something like this : Thanks. Thanks a lot. By the way, before I forget : To work in soap operas... ...some of you are gonna have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along... - How was teaching last night ? - Great ! You get to say stuff like : "Hey, the bell doesn't dismiss you. I dismiss you." Oh, nice. Guess what ? I got an audition for All My Children ! It's this great part. This boxer named Nick. And I'm so, so right for it. He's just like me. Except that he's a boxer... ...and has an evil twin. Hear ye, hear ye ! Delivery from the Mattress King ! - You Miss Geller ? - Okay. Sign here. Do I have a middle name ? All right. Monica "Felula"... ...Geller. It's that bedroom there.