Episode 04 - part 02
Wow, lights.
Okay, boys.
Let's make this night so legendary, they caution children about it.
Lower the drawbridge!
[Elfo] What the hell?
Uh, yeah, lower the giant painting of the countryside.
[people cheering]
[gnome] Is this Number One Castle Drive?
[vocalizing]
♪ Let's party ♪
[people cheering]
Welcome, Seekers.
Take your assigned positions and prepare for our sacred ceremony.
At the sound of the gong, let the ritual begin.
[bang]
[chuckles]
Hey, so, you gonna ask me to dance or what, huh?
Dance? Why, I'd be delighted. I love to dance.
Whoa! You're King Zog's daughter.
It's cool, man. He's out of town, so--
Actually, sorry, I'm late for a crusade.
I love to dance.
Watch this.
[scatting]
[sighs] Why does everyone have to know me?
-[fiddle music playing] -[indistinct chatter]
[sighs]
[snoring]
Did you wanna maybe dance? No, me neither.
[laughs]
I don't either. I hate dancing.
[laughs] Do you wanna dance?
It would... It'd be crazy if we danced right now, right?
[scoffs] Look at all those fools dancing. It would be so...
It would be so stupid for us to join them, right?
Almost everyone's dancing. [chuckles] I mean...
would... would you... Would you wanna do that as well?
[sighs]
[Elfo] 312, 313...
You're missing your chance, dude.
Oh, great, now you made me lose count.
This is your moment.
She's standing there alone. You're all fueled up on cheese.
Make your move, stupid!
You're right. I'm gonna march up to Bean
and say something I'll have figured out by the time I get there.
Hey, you can't park on my lawn.
My flaming arrow says I can.
You've got a talking flaming arrow?
What?
No, it's just a regular arrow.
Well, I'm sorry.
Things get confusing in a world with occasional magic and curses.
And while I am a fan of such worlds,
I just feel some more clearly set out rules
for what can and cannot happen would help us-- [grunts]
He says it's okay to park here.
Whoa! Elfo. [chuckles] Would you look at us, huh?
Couple of wallflowers, standing over by the snack table eating chee...
What happened to all the cheese? There were over 300 cubes over here.
[clears throat] Bean, Bean, Bean. [chuckles]
-Um, well, can I be honest with you? -Yeah, of course.
When I left Elfwood, I had no idea why, but then, here, tonight,
I feel like I finally know why.
Um... Uh... [groans]
[chuckling] I don't know how to say this. Ugh!
Go ahead. Say it.
-I'm into big girls. -What?
Just hear me out.
Before I left, I didn't have any idea that my size, my stature, was...
What do you call it?
-Dinky? -What?
[stuttering] I don't if I'd say "dinky."
I guess what I'm trying to get at, and not so eloquently, but...
could you ever go out with a guy who's dinky?
Well, I have been drinking a lot tonight, so it might just be the grog talking,
but, you know, I think maybe I--
Oh, God, Vikings! [screams]
Let's burn this place down!
[all gasp]
With our smooth northern dance style.
[groaning]
You still seem tense. Chazz is gonna take it down a notch, okay?
Just me and you.
Just Chazz and the king, havin' a dialogue.
You know, I thought about being a king once.
Just wasn't born that way. Those are the breaks.
[laughing]
Oh, would you listen to me. Woe is Chazz, huh?
Woe is gonna be you if you don't--
[shushing]
We all get to share our feelings.
-This here is the feeling stick. -[stick rattles]
Whoever holds the stick gets to share their feelings.
I'm feelin' furious! I'm gonna--
Bup, bup, bup. Who has the stick?
[grunts] Chazz has the stick.
He sure does. And how do you feel about that?
Ha! Chazzed. Only I can share the feelings.
-But seriously, I was a chubby kid... -[groaning]
...and even though I knew I was destined for greatness,
the flab on my arms said different. Poor Chazz.
Oh, no. Party crashers!
Uh, night's over! Tell your parents to pick you up.
Hey, chill out. This is Bean's party.
Whoo! Horse at a party! Party horse rules!
Hey, nice. She drank her way out of depression like a pro.
Stupid lucky horse.
-[horse neighs] -Whoa! Easy, girl. [neighs]
The horse has big, beautiful teeth. Like you.
-Your tooth is beautiful, too. -Ah.
Um, please don't sit in the king's chair.
It's for his royal ass only. Thank you.
Ha! Kings! I fear no kings.
Queens either. Dukes kinda give me the willies, but kings? Bah!
Hi. You seem unafraid of kings and probably have other qualities.
I am also funny guy...
because inside there is pain.
Welcome to my party.
So this is your castle? You're not like some stuck up princess, are you?
Did I say my party? I meant thy party.
I'm all about possessive pronouns.
They be the latest thing, does not thee know?
Where I come from, we don't possess our pronouns.
We let them run free, like the majestic snow chimp.
[both chuckle]
Can I show you around?
[chuckles mockingly] Ugh!
Odval and Sorcerio will put an end to all this naughtiness.
-Oh, my! -Wow.
Elfo, you mustn't be here. This is an ancient secret society
that conducts great matters of state and diplomacy.
We are the shadow behind the crown,
the prime movers of history, the unseen hand.
-[yelps] -[man giggles]
It looks like people are just having sex.
Oh, yes, we do that, too. Diplomacy is complicated.
I don't want to interrupt whatever those four people are doing,
but could you come throw a wet blanket...
not that wet blanket, on the party upstairs?
I'm sorry.
I'm sort of in the middle of someone right now.
Come back later with an open mind.
And your sassy friend, the talking cat.
[grunts]
Wait. You're not a princess, but you have a room in this castle?
What?
No. This isn't my room. This is, uh, her room.
Meet Princess Tiabunty.
Oh, uh, I'm a princess, I is.
Um, this is me bed that me family lives on and...
[whispering] Oh, so soft.
[groaning and snoring]
