George Carlin, George Carlin - Good Ideas

George Carlin - Good Ideas

I got strange ideas anyways. You know what I think they ought to do with those Miss America contest? I think they ought to keep making the losers come back until they win. Huh? I'll tell you, that would get a little spooky after about thirty five years or so huh? "I just want to work on world peace." "Fine, sit down before you fall down, will you? And pick up all these goddam batons." I got a lot of ideas. You know what I think? I think Kleenex ought to have little targets on them. Wouldn't that be a good idea? Little bulls-eyes right in the middle of the Kleenex. Make it kind of sporty when you're with you friends. KKKkkkkoooott! Look Dave, an 85! Huh? That's a good idea. I got a lot of good ideas. Trouble is most of them suck. I got a lot of good ideas for new products like that. That's what I think about on my off-duty hours. Things we need. Products we ought to have that we don't have. You know what we ought to have? We ought to have a diet salad dressing called 500 islands. See, good goddam ideas like that. Eh? A Christian deodorant ,"thou shalt not smell". How about a feminine hygiene spray called "Sprunt"? Huh? Well, you'd never forget the name, would you? It would always be right on the tip of your tongue. See? Marketing, marketing, that's where I belong. Among other places. Marketing. Here's an idea I got. This is a yo-yo with a 2000 foot string. You use it when you visit the grand canyon. See, I'm a visionary. I'm ahead of my time. Trouble is, I'm only about an hour and a half ahead. Here's a good idea. A light bulb that only shines on things worth looking at. Yeah, too idealistic. Never make any money on a thing like that. Here's something that's going to make a fortune. Get in on this. This is a roach spray. It doesn't kill the roaches, but it fills them with self doubt as to whether or not they're in the right house. Here's something I'm trying to interest the Japanese electronics firms in this. This would be a great product for Sony. This is a combination cassette player and colonostomy bag. It's called "Shitman"! Huh? Sure. Well you'd never see that. You'd never see that.

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George Carlin - Good Ideas |George Carlin|| George Carlin - Gute Ideen George Carlin - Buenas ideas George Carlin - Bonnes idées ジョージ・カーリン - グッドアイディア George Carlin - Geros idėjos George Carlin - Dobre pomysły George Carlin - Boas ideias Джордж Карлин - Хорошие идеи George Carlin - İyi Fikirler Джордж Карлін - Хороші ідеї 乔治-卡林 - 好主意乔治-卡林 - 好主意

I got strange ideas anyways. ||||어쨌든 어쨌든 이상한 생각이 들었습니다. У меня вообще странные идеи. You know what I think they ought to do with those Miss America contest? ||||||должны|||||||конкурс красоты |||||||||||||대회 |||||||||||||concurso |||||||||با|||| 미스 아메리카 대회를 어떻게 해야 한다고 생각하는지 아세요? Знаете, что, по-моему, нужно сделать с этим конкурсом "Мисс Америка"? I think they ought to keep making the losers come back until they win. 패자가 이길 때까지 계속 돌아오게 만들어야 한다고 생각합니다. Я думаю, они должны заставлять проигравших возвращаться, пока они не выиграют. Huh? А? I’ll tell you, that would get a little spooky after about thirty five years or so huh? ||||||||spooky|||||||| vou||te||seria||||assustador|||||||| 35년 정도 지나면 좀 으스스해지지 않을까요? Скажу вам, что через тридцать пять лет или около того это стало бы немного жутковато, а? Скажу тобі, це стане трохи моторошно приблизно через тридцять п’ять років, так? "I just want to work on world peace." "Fine, sit down before you fall down, will you? "좋아, 쓰러지기 전에 앉을래? "Ладно, садись, пока не упал, хорошо? And pick up all these goddam batons." ||||||چماق‌ها ||||||batons ||||||막대기들 |||||malditos|bastões ||||||дубинки 그리고 이 망할 봉을 모두 집어들어요." И заберите все эти чертовы дубинки". І візьміть усі ці кляті палиці». I got a lot of ideas. You know what I think? 제 생각이 뭔지 아세요? I think Kleenex ought to have little targets on them. |فکر می‌کنم|||||||| ||Kleenex||||||| ||크리넥스||||||| ||lenços de papel||||||| |||||||мишени|| 클리넥스에는 작은 표적이 있어야 한다고 생각합니다. Я считаю, что на клинексе должны быть маленькие мишени. Я думаю, що Kleenex має мати на них маленькі мішені. Wouldn’t that be a good idea? 좋은 생각이 아닐까요? Little bulls-eyes right in the middle of the Kleenex. |작은 황소|||||||| |bolinhas|||||||| 크리넥스 한가운데에 작은 과녁이 있습니다. Make it kind of sporty when you’re with you friends. ||||스포츠처럼||||| ||||esportivo||||| 친구들과 함께라면 스포티한 분위기를 연출할 수 있습니다. KKKkkkkoooott! 하하하하하 KKKkkkkoooott! Кккккккоооотт! Look Dave, an 85! 85년생인 데이브를 보세요! Huh? That’s a good idea. I got a lot of good ideas. Trouble is most of them suck. |||||형편없다 문제는 대부분이 형편없다는 것입니다. Проблема в том, что большинство из них - отстой. I got a lot of good ideas for new products like that. That’s what I think about on my off-duty hours. ||||||||нерабочее время| Вот о чем я думаю во внеслужебное время. Things we need. Products we ought to have that we don’t have. You know what we ought to have? 우리가 가져야 할 것이 뭔지 아세요? We ought to have a diet salad dressing called 500 islands. |||||||заправка для салата|| |||||||드레싱|| У нас должна быть диетическая заправка для салата под названием "500 островов". See, good goddam ideas like that. 정말 좋은 아이디어입니다. Eh? A Christian deodorant ,"thou shalt not smell". ||향수|너는|너는 ~할 것이다|| ||desodorante|||| 기독교 탈취제, "너는 냄새를 맡지 말라". Христианский дезодорант, "ты не должен пахнуть". Християнський дезодорант «Не пахни». How about a feminine hygiene spray called "Sprunt"? ||||hygiene|||Feminine hygiene spray |||||||스프런트 ||||higiene|||Sprunt 여성 위생 스프레이 '스프런트'는 어떠세요? Wat dacht je van een spray voor vrouwelijke hygiëne genaamd "Sprunt"? Как насчет спрея для женской гигиены под названием "Sprunt"? Як щодо спрею для жіночої гігієни «Спрунт»? Huh? Well, you’d never forget the name, would you? It would always be right on the tip of your tongue. |||||||кончик языка||| 항상 혀끝에 닿을 것입니다. Он всегда будет на кончике вашего языка. See? Marketing, marketing, that’s where I belong. 마케팅, 마케팅, 그곳이 바로 제가 속한 곳입니다. Маркетинг, маркетинг, вот где мое место. Among other places. 다른 곳도 마찬가지입니다. Marketing. 마케팅. Here’s an idea I got. This is a yo-yo with a 2000 foot string. ||||||||string ||||||||줄 ||||io|||| 2000피트 길이의 줄이 달린 요요입니다. Это йо-йо со струной длиной 2000 футов. You use it when you visit the grand canyon. ||||||||그랜드 캐년 ||||||||cânion 그랜드 캐년을 방문할 때 사용합니다. See, I’m a visionary. |||Видишь, я провидец. |||visionary |||비전 있는 사람 |||visionário 저는 선구자입니다. Бачите, я фантазер. I’m ahead of my time. 시대를 앞서가고 있습니다. Trouble is, I’m only about an hour and a half ahead. 문제는 제가 한 시간 반 정도만 앞서 있다는 것입니다. Проблема в том, что у меня впереди всего полтора часа. Here’s a good idea. A light bulb that only shines on things worth looking at. ||лампочка|||||||| ||bulb|||||||| ||전구|||||||| Лампочка, которая светит только на то, на что стоит обратить внимание. Лампочка, яка світить лише на речі, на які варто подивитися. Yeah, too idealistic. ||너무 이상적이 네, 너무 이상적이죠. Never make any money on a thing like that. 그런 식으로 돈을 벌지 마세요. Here’s something that’s going to make a fortune. 여기 큰돈을 벌 수 있는 것이 있습니다. Get in on this. Примите участие в этом. This is a roach spray. |||Это спрей от тараканов.| |||바퀴벌레| 바퀴벌레 스프레이입니다. It doesn’t kill the roaches, but it fills them with self doubt as to whether or not they’re in the right house. ||||바퀴벌레|||자신감이 없|||||||||||||| ||||baratas|||preenche|||||||||||||| 바퀴벌레를 죽이지는 않지만, 바퀴벌레가 제대로 된 집에 있는지에 대한 자괴감으로 가득 차게 합니다. Це не вбиває тарганів, але сповнює їх сумнівами щодо того, чи вони в тому будинку. Here’s something I’m trying to interest the Japanese electronics firms in this. |||||заинтересовать|||||| |||||||||업체들|| 일본 전자업체들이 관심을 가져야 할 부분이 있습니다. Я пытаюсь заинтересовать в этом японские фирмы, производящие электронику. This would be a great product for Sony. This is a combination cassette player and colonostomy bag. |||||||bolsa de colostomia| Dit is een combinatie van een cassettespeler en een colonostomiezak. Это комбинированный кассетный плеер и колоностомический мешок. Це комбінація касетного плеєра та колоностомічного мішка. It’s called "Shitman"! ||"Shitman" Huh? Sure. Well you’d never see that. You’d never see that.