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All Ears English, 75- How to Show Respect While You Argue in English

75- How to Show Respect While You Argue in English

Lindsay: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 75, Teaching Tuesday: “How to Show Respect While You Argue in English.” [Instrumental]

Gabby: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, where you'll finally get real, native English conversation. Now here are your hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer' and Gabby Wallace, the ‘Language Angel,' coming to you from Boston, Massachusetts, USA.

Lindsay: Today you'll learn four English phrases to bring to your next friendly argument.

[Instrumental]

Gabby:

Hey Lindsay. How's it going?

Lindsay:

Hey Gabby. I'm doing well.

Gabby:

Great.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Gabby:

So today we're going to reflect on our conversation, our argument.

Lindsay:

That was fun.

Gabby:

[making cat like noises]. Argument noises there.

Lindsay:

I know. After the episode, you (like) attacked me. It was crazy. I couldn't believe that.

Gabby:

Yeah, things got a little crazy, but thanks to our tactical and respectable, respectful (uh) English skills, we were able to (um) come to some middle ground which is one of our phrases for you today.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Why don't we go ahead and teach that phrase.

Gabby:

Take it away.

Lindsay:

So what do you mean when you say “middle ground”?

Gabby:

Well, I said it in the conversation, “Maybe there's some middle ground.” So by middle ground, I mean somewhere we agree because my opinion is way over on the right and your opinion is way over on the left. But there has to be some middle ground, somewhere in the middle that we could meet.

Lindsay:

Yeah, exactly.

So you could say “come to a consensus also.” Gabby:

Yeah.

Lindsay:

A little bit of that, right?

Gabby:

Maybe look for some, some points in common or some shared opinions.

Lindsay:

Yeah, exactly.

Gabby:

Something we can compromise on.

Lindsay:

(Um-hm).

Gabby:

Cool.

Lindsay:

And then we used the phrase – I, I said this, I said (um), “(I mean) I see what you mean.” Gabby:

(Uh-huh).

Lindsay:

So what is going on here? I used the word ‘mean' twice.

Gabby:

(Uh), okay. So I think when you say “I mean,” it's kind of a filler, or it's a hedge to soften your statement and then when you said, “I see what you mean,” you're offering a concession, (you know), you're showing not, not that you agree with me necessarily, but that you understand what I'm saying and that you respect what I'm saying.

Lindsay:

Exactly.

Gabby:

So I imagine that maybe after this, you (um) might have shared an opinion of yours that was a little different.

Lindsay:

Definitely.

Gabby:

‘Cause (because) sometimes we follow this with ‘however' or a ‘but.' Lindsay:

Right.

Right.

Gabby:

“I see what you mean, ‘but'…” Lindsay:

I probably did do that. So this is a good way to prepare the person you're speaking with for a contradicting opinion.

Gabby:

Yeah, show that, (you know), you understand and you respect them, but you have a different opinion.

Lindsay:

Definitely.

Gabby:

So after that, (um) we said “makes sense.” Lindsay:

(Uh-hm). And when I said this, I took off “it”, right? So I dropped the subject there.

Gabby:

Easy way to shorten it.

Lindsay:

(It) happens a lot when we speak English naturally.

Gabby:

Yeah.

Lindsay:

(Mm-hm).

Gabby:

(Um) so “makes sense” is another way to show that you're listening, you understand and you respect the person who's talking, but it might be used as a way to introduce your different opinion, (like) your opposite opinion from the person you're talking to.

Lindsay:

Right, so it could be again, make sense, but… Gabby:

Right.

Lindsay:

…or however.

Gabby:

Still arguing right?

Lindsay:

(Mm-hm).

Gabby:

(Um) (I mean) it could be a way where you, you introduce that you're agreeing with the person, but we use it in a way to soften an argument.

Lindsay:

Yeah, that's what we're doing here, we're softening the argument.

Gabby:

Right.

Okay, and then last, we have one more.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

So you used the expression “My question would be…” So here you're challenging what I'm saying. And why didn't you say, “My question is…”?

Gabby:

Well, I could've said that but I was being more polite, more indirect by using the conditional, “My question would be…” It's just a little (like) more polite I guess.

Lindsay:

Yeah, I, I think of it as like… Gabby:

Softer.

Lindsay:

…you're kind of stepping back, and you're kind of stepping out of reality.

Both:

Right…

Lindsay:

…to more of an unreal sort of situation.

Gabby:

Let's imagine.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Yeah.

Gabby:

Lindsay:

“If you made that argument, my question would be…” Gabby:

But if you want to sound a little bit more (uh) direct, a little bit more powerful, definitely say “My question is…” Lindsay:

Definitely.

You could totally do that. Maybe it just depends on the context of the argument… Gabby:

Right.

Lindsay:

…depends on the person you're arguing with, the topic, how passionate are you about that topic?

Gabby:

Right.

Yeah.

So little changes in the language can (uh) kind of show what you're trying to express better.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Gabby:

So should we repeat?

Lindsay:

Sure.

Gabby:

Cool.

All right. So the first phrase “Maybe there's some middle ground.” Okay.

Lindsay:

“(I mean), I see what you mean.” Gabby:

“(It) Makes sense.”

Lindsay:

“My question would be…”

Gabby:

All right. Awesome.

[Instrumental]

Lindsay: If you like to put your ears into English with Lindsay and Gabby, be sure to subscribe to the podcast audio in iTunes for free on your computer or on your smartphone. Thanks for listening to the All Ears English Podcast. See you next time.

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Lindsay: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 75, Teaching Tuesday: “How to Show Respect While You Argue in English.” [Instrumental] ||||||||||||||||||||instrumental Lindsay:這是一個全耳英語播客,第 75 集,週二教學:“如何在用英語爭論時表達尊重。” [器樂]

Gabby: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, where you'll finally get real, native English conversation. Now here are your hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer' and Gabby Wallace, the ‘Language Angel,' coming to you from Boston, Massachusetts, USA. ||||||||||||Gabby Wallace|||Thiên thần||||||Massachusetts|

Lindsay: Today you'll learn four English phrases to bring to your next friendly argument. Lindsay:今天你將學習四個英語短語,以便在下一次友好爭論中使用。

[Instrumental]

Gabby:

Hey Lindsay. How's it going?

Lindsay:

Hey Gabby. I'm doing well.

Gabby:

Great.

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Gabby:

So today we're going to reflect on our conversation, our argument. |||||反思||||| ||||||||||discussione Поэтому сегодня мы поразмышляем над нашим разговором, нашим спором. 所以今天我們要反思我們的對話、我們的爭論。

Lindsay:

That was fun.

Gabby:

[making cat like noises]. [發出像貓一樣的聲音]。 Argument noises there. 那裡有爭論聲。

Lindsay:

I know. After the episode, you (like) attacked me. |||||攻击| 劇集結束後,你(喜歡)攻擊了我。 It was crazy. I couldn't believe that. 我簡直不敢相信。

Gabby:

Yeah, things got a little crazy, but thanks to our tactical and respectable, respectful (uh) English skills, we were able to (um) come to some middle ground which is one of our phrases for you today. ||||||||||战术性的||体面的||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||tactical||respectable|respectful|||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||戦術的||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||поважні||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||chiến thuật||tôn trọng|tôn trọng|||||||||||||thỏa thuận||||||||| Vâng, mọi thứ đã hơi điên rồ một chút, nhưng nhờ vào kỹ năng tiếng Anh chiến thuật và đáng tôn trọng của chúng tôi, chúng tôi đã có thể tìm được một số điểm chung, đó là một trong những cụm từ mà chúng tôi muốn chia sẻ với bạn hôm nay. 是的,事情變得有點瘋狂,但由於我們的戰術和令人尊敬的、令人尊敬的(呃)英語技能,我們能夠(嗯)找到一些中間立場,這是我們今天對你們說的一句話之一。

Lindsay: Lindsay:

Yeah. Vâng.

Why don't we go ahead and teach that phrase. 我們為什麼不繼續教這個短語呢?

Gabby:

Take it away. 持って行って。 把它拿開。

Lindsay: リンゼイ:

So what do you mean when you say “middle ground”? ||||||||中間| 「中間地点」というと、どういう意味ですか? 那麼,當你說「中間立場」時,你的意思是什麼?

Gabby:

Well, I said it in the conversation, “Maybe there's some middle ground.” So by middle ground, I mean somewhere we agree because my opinion is way over on the right and your opinion is way over on the left. Eh bien, je l'ai dit dans la conversation, "Peut-être qu'il y a un terrain d'entente." Donc, par terrain d'entente, je veux dire quelque part où nous sommes d'accord parce que mon opinion est bien à droite et votre opinion est bien à gauche. まあ、私は会話の中で "中間地点があるかもしれない "と言ったんだ。つまり、私の意見は右寄りで、あなたの意見は左寄りだから、中間地点というのは、私たちが同意するところという意味なんだ。 嗯,我在談話中說過,“也許有一些中間立場。”因此,我所說的中間立場是指我們在某個方面達成一致,因為我的觀點偏右,而你的觀點偏左。 But there has to be some middle ground, somewhere in the middle that we could meet. Mais il doit y avoir un terrain d'entente, quelque part au milieu que nous pourrions rencontrer. 但必須有一些中間立場,在中間的某個地方我們可以相遇。

Lindsay:

Yeah, exactly.

So you could say “come to a consensus also.” Gabby: |||||||达成共识|| |||||||consensus|| ||||合意に達する||||| |||||||консенсус|| |||||||thỏa thuận|| 所以你可以說「也達成共識」。蓋比:

Yeah.

Lindsay:

A little bit of that, right? 有一點點吧?

Gabby:

Maybe look for some, some points in common or some shared opinions. 共通点とか、共通の意見とか、そういうものを探してみるといい。 也許尋找一些共同點或一些共同的觀點。

Lindsay: 林賽:

Yeah, exactly.

Gabby:

Something we can compromise on. |||thỏa hiệp| |||compromise| |||погодитися| 私たちが妥協できるものを。 我們可以妥協的事。

Lindsay:

(Um-hm). |гм

Gabby:

Cool.

Lindsay:

And then we used the phrase – I, I said this, I said (um), “(I mean) I see what you mean.” Gabby: 然後我們用了這句話——我,我說了這個,我說(嗯),“(我的意思是)我明白你的意思。”蓋比:

(Uh-huh).

Lindsay:

So what is going on here? 那麼這是怎麼回事呢? I used the word ‘mean' twice. 我用了兩次「意思」這個詞。

Gabby:

(Uh), okay. So I think when you say “I mean,” it's kind of a filler, or it's a hedge to soften your statement and then when you said, “I see what you mean,” you're offering a concession, (you know), you're showing not, not that you agree with me necessarily, but that you understand what I'm saying and that you respect what I'm saying. ||||||||||||填充词||||缓和语||||||||||||||||||让步|||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||つなぎ言葉||||言い訳||和らげる||||||||||||||||譲歩|||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||заповнювач||||страховка||||||||||||||||||уступка|||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||riempitivo||||riserva||ammorbidire||affermazione|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| つまり、"I mean "と言うときは、自分の発言を和らげるためのフィラー、あるいはヘッジのようなもので、"I see what you mean "と言ったときは、譲歩を提示し、(私の言うことに)必ずしも同意しているわけではないが、私の言っていることを理解し、私の言っていることを尊重していることを示しているのだと思う。 所以我認為,當你說「我的意思是」時,這是一種填充物,或者是一種對沖,可以軟化你的陳述,然後當你說「我明白你的意思」時,你就在做出讓步,(你知道) ,你表現出的不是,並不是你一定同意我的觀點,而是你理解我所說的並且尊重我所說的。

Lindsay:

Exactly.

Gabby:

So I imagine that maybe after this, you (um) might have shared an opinion of yours that was a little different. 所以我想也許在此之後,你(嗯)可能會分享你的一些不同的觀點。

Lindsay:

Definitely.

Gabby:

‘Cause (because) sometimes we follow this with ‘however' or a ‘but.' 因為有時我們會在後面加上「然而」或「但是」。 Lindsay:

Right.

Right.

Gabby:

“I see what you mean, ‘but'…” Lindsay: 「我明白你的意思,『但是』…」Lindsay:

I probably did do that. 我可能確實這麼做了。 So this is a good way to prepare the person you're speaking with for a contradicting opinion. |||||||||||||||相反的| |||||||||||||||contradicting| |||||||||||||||反対する| |||||||||||||||суперечливу| 因此,這是讓與你交談的人準備好接受相反意見的好方法。

Gabby:

Yeah, show that, (you know), you understand and you respect them, but you have a different opinion. 是的,表明,(你知道),你理解並尊重他們,但你有不同的看法。

Lindsay:

Definitely.

Gabby:

So after that, (um) we said “makes sense.” Lindsay: Donc après cela, (euh) nous avons dit "ça a du sens". Lindsey : 所以在那之後,(嗯)我們說「有道理」。林賽:

(Uh-hm). And when I said this, I took off “it”, right? ||||||ho tolto||| Et quand j'ai dit ça, j'ai enlevé "ça", non ? そう言ったとき、私は "それ "を外したよね? И когда я это сказал, я убрал "это", верно? 當我說這句話時,我把「它」脫掉了,對嗎? So I dropped the subject there. J'ai donc lâché le sujet là. だから、その話はそこで打ち切った。 Поэтому я оставил эту тему. 所以我就放棄這個話題了。

Gabby:

Easy way to shorten it. |||make it shorter| |||短縮する| |||скоротити| Un moyen facile de le raccourcir. 短くするのは簡単だ。 縮短它的簡單方法。

Lindsay:

(It) happens a lot when we speak English naturally. 當我們自然地說英語時,這種情況經常發生。

Gabby:

Yeah.

Lindsay:

(Mm-hm).

Gabby:

(Um) so “makes sense” is another way to show that you're listening, you understand and you respect the person who's talking, but it might be used as a way to introduce your different opinion, (like) your opposite opinion from the person you're talking to. ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||opposite||||||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||として||||||||||||||||| (嗯)所以「有道理」是另一種方式來表明你正在傾聽,你理解並且尊重說話的人,但它可能被用來作為一種方式來介紹你的不同觀點,(例如)你的相反觀點正在和你說話的人。

Lindsay:

Right, so it could be again, make sense, but… Gabby: 是的,所以可能又是這樣,有道理,但…蓋比:

Right.

Lindsay:

…or however.

Gabby:

Still arguing right? 還在爭論對嗎?

Lindsay:

(Mm-hm).

Gabby:

(Um) (I mean) it could be a way where you, you introduce that you're agreeing with the person, but we use it in a way to soften an argument. ||||||||||||||同意|||||||||||||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||ammorbidire|| ||||||||||||||згоден|||||||||||||| (嗯)(我的意思是)這可能是你介紹你同意這個人的一種方式,但我們用它來緩和爭論。

Lindsay:

Yeah, that's what we're doing here, we're softening the argument. |||||||缓和|| |||||||пом'якшуємо|| 是的,這就是我們在這裡所做的,我們正在軟化爭論。

Gabby:

Right.

Okay, and then last, we have one more. 好的,最後,我們還有一個。

Lindsay:

Yeah.

So you used the expression “My question would be…” So here you're challenging what I'm saying. 所以你使用了「我的問題是…」這樣的表達方式,所以你在這裡挑戰了我所說的。 And why didn't you say, “My question is…”? 為什麼不說「我的問題是…」?

Gabby:

Well, I could've said that but I was being more polite, more indirect by using the conditional, “My question would be…” It's just a little (like) more polite I guess. |||||||||||||||その|||||||||||||| 好吧,我本來可以這麼說,但透過使用條件句,我變得更有禮貌,更間接,「我的問題是…」我想這只是更有禮貌一點。

Lindsay:

Yeah, I, I think of it as like… Gabby:

Softer. 更柔和

Lindsay:

…you're kind of stepping back, and you're kind of stepping out of reality. |||stai facendo un passo||||||||| ……你有點後退,你有點脫離現實。

Both:

Right…

Lindsay:

…to more of an unreal sort of situation. ||||不真实||| ……更多的是一種不真實的情況。

Gabby:

Let's imagine. 讓我們想像一下。

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Yeah.

Gabby:

Lindsay:

“If you made that argument, my question would be…” Gabby: 「如果你提出這個論點,我的問題是…」蓋比:

But if you want to sound a little bit more (uh) direct, a little bit more powerful, definitely say “My question is…” Lindsay: |||||||||||||||more||||||| 但如果你想讓聲音聽起來更直接一點、更有力量一點,一定要說「我的問題是…」 Lindsay:

Definitely.

You could totally do that. 你完全可以做到這一點。 Maybe it just depends on the context of the argument… Gabby: 也許這只是取決於爭論的背景…加比:

Right.

Lindsay:

…depends on the person you're arguing with, the topic, how passionate are you about that topic? ……取決於與你爭論的人、話題,你對這個話題有多熱情?

Gabby:

Right.

Yeah.

So little changes in the language can (uh) kind of show what you're trying to express better. 語言上的微小變化可以(呃)更好地表達你想要表達的內容。

Lindsay:

Yeah.

Gabby:

So should we repeat? 那我們應該重複嗎?

Lindsay:

Sure.

Gabby:

Cool.

All right. So the first phrase “Maybe there's some middle ground.” Okay. 所以第一句話“也許有一些中間立場。”好的。

Lindsay:

“(I mean), I see what you mean.” Gabby: “(我的意思是),我明白你的意思。”蓋比:

“(It) Makes sense.” “(這說得通。”

Lindsay:

“My question would be…” “我的問題是…”

Gabby:

All right. 好的。 Awesome.

[Instrumental]

Lindsay: If you like to put your ears into English with Lindsay and Gabby, be sure to subscribe to the podcast audio in iTunes for free on your computer or on your smartphone. Lindsay:如果您想與 Lindsay 和 Gabby 一起聆聽英語,請務必在電腦或智慧型手機上免費訂閱 iTunes 中的播客音訊。 Thanks for listening to the All Ears English Podcast. See you next time.